


Another Day, Another Year

by Cosmic_Myths



Series: Let The Stars Guide You Home [1]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Almost Canon-Compliant, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ben Hargreeves-centric, F/F, Gen, Ghost Ben Hargreeves, Good Sibling Ben Hargreeves, Good Sibling Vanya Hargreeves, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Not Season/Series 02 Compliant, Post-Season/Series 01, Pre-Canon, Running Away, Sibling Bonding, Vanya Hargreeves-centric, no beta we die like ben
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:35:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26171296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cosmic_Myths/pseuds/Cosmic_Myths
Summary: (Revised Summary)At 15, Ben and Vanya dream of running away. They make plans and share promises of freedom under the stars. They're so close to getting out of the hell they were raised in.At 16, Vanya leaves the house alone.
Relationships: Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Vanya Hargreeves/Original Female Character(s)(minor)
Series: Let The Stars Guide You Home [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1917691
Comments: 38
Kudos: 238





	1. Let's Get Out of This Town

**Author's Note:**

> All titles are from the song "This Town" by Kygo(ft. Sasha Sloan).  
> Hope you enjoy :)

It starts off as a joke. Vanya and Ben are reading in the library together as they usually do. They’re both reading fantasy novels and know that the minute they’re done, they’ll trade. There’s nothing unusual about that afternoon, and yet an idea is formed. 

The protagonist of her book runs away with her best friend. They live for a few years whilst constantly moving before eventually running into an underground society of magical beings. It’s not an unusual story, and yet Vanya feels a deep yearning. Not for the adventure, but for the freedom of running away. 

“I wonder what would happen if we ran away,” Vanya says quietly so only Ben can hear her. Not that there’s any point. They’re in the 2nd story library in the east wing. It’s one of the rooms nobody ever uses and there’s no security cameras. Still, there’s something about whispering which makes the space seem sacred. 

Ben hums in response before pausing to actually process what she said. He feels something akin to hope, but quickly squashes it down. Instead he chooses to take the safer route. The route that makes it a joke, a ridiculous fantasy, a scenario with no attachments.

“Well, first we’d leave in the middle of the night and follow the trail of pixies who will guide us to an ancient forest,” He begins. 

Vanya laughs in response and decides to play along.

“Let me guess. We’d find a ring of flowers. When we step in, the entire world will shift into a brighter, more magical version,” Vanya continues. 

Ben grins and soon they’re creating an entire world full of secrets and mysteries waiting to be discovered. They talk for hours, their books are long forgotten, until their mother finds them and tells them it’s time for dinner. She’s the only one other than themselves that knows about their space in the library.  _ (Five used to know, but thinking about him hurts too much so they never bring it up).  _

They don’t speak of the world they made again, but that night Vanya writes it all down in a notebook. She remembers to add every little detail, including every character they made and every adventure they told. Vanya is 15 when she starts keeping a journal of worlds. Vanya is 15 when she begins creating stories. 

Vanya is 15 when she dreams of running away.

* * *

They don’t take the idea seriously until 3 weeks later. They’re in the library again and Vanya is looking through the shelves for a new book to read. Ben is content to sit back and let Vanya pick out the books, it’s her turn afterall. 

Vanya goes through the shelves until a book catches her interests. She pulls it from the shelf and it’s a book about survival. She shows it to Ben and they start with making a story of a young protagonist who gets lost in the woods. They reference the book whenever they get stuck on what the protagonist should do. It’s Vanya’s new favorite pastime. She enjoys creating the stories more than reading them and she even enjoys it more than her violin. She definitely enjoys it more than just sitting with Ben in silence. 

It isn’t until after she writes the story down in her notebook that she thinks of running away again. She figures, if they already know how to survive in the wild, then surely they can figure out how to survive on their own. 

When Vanya brings it up to Ben the next day, he feels hope once more. This time, instead of locking it away, he holds onto it. They begin making a plan. First, they need to know where to go. Neither one wants to stay in the city. 

They spend hours looking over atlases and maps. They plan routes, how long they’ll stay in one place, and where they’ll eventually settle. They both agree to settling on a coast. The question is, how will they get there? 

“We’ll need to decide on a mode of transportation,” Ben says on their 3rd day of planning. 

Vanya takes a moment to think about it. Getting their own car would be tricky and neither one knows how to drive. 

“We could use trains and buses. It’d be easy enough to transfer to different lines and we can take some time to explore the cities we stop at,” Vanya explains.

Ben nods and writes that down in a notebook of his own. Unlike Vanya’s, his notebook is for actual planning. 

“Assuming dad sends people to look for us, we should get a different outfit,” Ben suggests. 

“If we want to get work, we should use a different last name. Though it might be harder to get a new ID,” Vanya replies. 

“It’ll cost money, but we could find someone to make us fake IDs. That’s another issue, money.” 

Vanya opens her mouth to continue talking, but is cut off by the announcement of dinner. 

* * *

Vanya mentally tallies the constellations she sees in the sky whilst waiting for Ben. When they went down to dinner, she had told him to meet her on the roof. Sadly, there was a last minute mission that interrupted dinner so he might not even show up. They’d returned an hour ago, but she knows Ben is always in a fragile state of mind after a mission. Nonetheless, she’ll wait for him. A quick glance at her watch tells her it’s only midnight. 

Getting bored of judging the constellations that looked nothing like what they were supposed to be, Vanya turns on a flashlight and grabs her notebook. She continues to flesh out the stories she and Ben have created. 

She hears footsteps approaching and nearly jumps in surprise. She turns around and sighs in relief when she notices it’s just Ben. He sends a small smile at her, but the hollow look in his eyes are illuminated by the flashlight. She wishes she could make it better, but she doesn’t know how. She does the next best thing and gestures him over. 

He sits and she instantly wraps him up in the blanket, successfully making him into a ‘Benrrito’. A benrrito is what Ben becomes when she wraps him up like a burrito. Thankfully, it was the right thing to do and he lets out a little laugh. 

They sit in silence for a while, just looking at the limited stars they can see. They see two shooting stars and laugh each time, both making wishes that the escape will turn out okay. Later, they’ll learn there was an annual meteor shower happening and if they had been in a place with less light pollution, they would have been able to make more wishes. 

“I was thinking about the escape earlier, and money is going to be the most important thing. I can try to pawn some of dad’s stuff like Klaus does, but I don’t want to take so much that he becomes suspicious,” Ben says after the second meteor. 

Vanya nods and her face scrunches up in deep thought. Her face brightens when she gets an idea.

“I can play violin on the street corner for money! I’m sure if I ask mom, she’ll let me since I’ll be practicing and I’ll still be close by. When I have enough money I’ll get us some clothes. If mom notices I’ll say I bought new violin strings”. 

Ben grins and tells her it’s a wonderful idea. If she’s making money on her own, then he won’t have to take too much from their dad meaning they’re less likely to be caught. 

There’s a shuffle of footsteps a floor below them and both instantly stiffen. They quiet their breathing and wait anxiously for the footsteps to pass. Thankfully, they do. They stare at each other before breaking into an awkward, relieved laugh. 

“We should make a code,” Vanya says suddenly, thinking of how they could’ve been caught. 

Ben’s curious gaze focuses on her, urging her to elaborate. 

“So we can talk about the escape without anyone knowing,” She explains. 

They spend hours under the stars writing the code and memorizing it so they won’t need to keep the key on their person. They both make one copy of the key in the notebooks and then tear up the original key. They go to sleep at 5 AM. They only get 1 hour of sleep, but it’s worth it. 

* * *

“Mom,” Vanya begins. Her siblings are in training so she went down to the kitchen to help her mother. 

“Yes dear?” Grace answers without looking up from what she was cooking. 

“I was thinking, what if instead of just practicing violin in my room all day, I could practice outside so other people can hear me play?” Vanya asks. 

Grace turns to look at her with a tight smile. She wants to tell Vanya she can do it, especially since she seems so hopeful, but she’s unsure how Reginald will react. She begins calculating the best way to bring it up for the highest chance of success. 

“I’ll speak to your father about it. Now, would you like to help me make cookies for after supper?” 

Vanya smiles in response and quickly gets the ingredients ready. As she helps her mother make cookies, she brainstorms other ways to get money in case this plan fails. 

The next day, after lunch while her siblings are training, she walks to the street corner and begins playing. She makes a total of $52.25. At first she was nervous, but it wasn’t much different than playing in her room. 

She enjoys it a lot more than she thought she would. Everytime someone lingers a moment longer makes a warm feeling bloom in her chest. There’s one person in particular who stands out. She walks by around the same time every day and always pauses to listen. She never gives any money, but that doesn’t really bother Vanya. 

After 5 days of playing, the girl approaches. Vanya’s in the middle of switching out the sheet music when it happens. The girl puts a $20 bill in Vanya’s violin case and then smiles.

“I’ve been listening to you the past 5 days. My school just started and I walk by this corner every day. It’s nice to hear you play,” She says and Vanya feels her cheeks heat up. 

“Thank you,” Vanya says. “Do you play an instrument?”

The girl grins and nods her head. Vanya instantly decides she likes the smile. In fact, she’s so focused on the girl’s smile that she almost doesn’t notice her outstretched hand. Vanya quickly takes it.

“I’m Jessica Delante, call me Jess, I’m 16 years old, I play the flute, my favorite color is purple, and I love your music. It’s nice to meet you,” She says, still smiling.

“I’m Vanya Vasiliev.” Vanya shares the name she and Ben agreed on for her. She knows she’s Russian, so together they’d looked through a book of Russian last names. She still doesn’t know why their father has a book of surnames, but it’s better not to question it.

“I’m 15 years old,” Vanya continues. “I play the violin, my favorite color is white, and I really like your eyes,” Oh no. She did not mean to say that. She coughs awkwardly, but Jess just laughs. 

“Why thank you. I have been told many times that my eyes are pretty, but never from someone like you,” She says with a wink.

Oh. 

Vanya can’t tell if she’s flirting. Is she flirting? Should she flirt back? 

“Well, I have to run, but it was nice talking! Bye!”

Just like that, she’s gone, lost in the crowd. Vanya stares before attempting to return to playing the violin. It’s a little shakier than when she began, but hopefully others don’t notice. 

* * *

Her siblings begin to notice the lack of violin music. Klaus and Allison corner her and question her about it after dinner about 2 weeks after she begins. She explains that she’s performing on the street and they both instantly get excited for her. It’s a nice talk, even if both of them now think she wants to become a famous violinist. She doesn’t have the heart to correct them. 

A few days later, Diego makes a comment on the lack of music. This surprises her since she didn’t think Diego would care. When she tells him about the street corner he attempts to subtly ask if she’ll play in the house at least once a week. Not that he cares of course. (Vanya can tell you, he wasn’t subtle at all. Of course, she didn’t want him to get upset, so she doesn’t comment on it). 

Just over a week after Diego cornered her, Luther asks her if anything’s wrong. He says that as leader it’s his job to make sure everyone is alright. She discreetly rolls her eyes, but appreciates the sentiment. She tells him about playing on the street and he seems genuinely happy for her. 

Throughout this time, her and Ben meet up and talk about the money they’ve begun collecting. They keep the money under a loose floorboard in the library. Ben’s sold some of the expensive looking items that could be found in the east wing—the wing people barely visit. 

“I’m thinking tomorrow I’ll get us some clothing. It’s November, so there should be a good winter selection.” 

Vanya and Ben have decided to leave during winter. It’s unexpected so it should be easier to slip away. It’s also closer and they both want to get out as soon as possible. As long as they’re properly prepared, it shouldn’t be too hard to survive. 

“You know my size, right?” Ben asks. 

Vanya nods her head. With all the planning settled, they talk of other things. Once more, they use their words to bring to life an entire universe. Both have recently begun reading sci-fi books and their new-found interest is reflected in the newest adventure they create. 

Vanya writes down notes about the universe while Ben draws some of the worlds and cities. By now, Vanya has multiple notebooks, all of which stay under the same floorboard with the money. 

“What’s your favorite universe you’ve created?” Vanya asks while making the family tree of one of the monarchies. 

“If I had to choose just one, I think I’d choose the one with flying ships. You know, the secret society in the sky that uses magic to hide itself?” Ben answers without looking up from his sketch of the palace. 

“Oh I like that one! I especially like the sentient wind currents from that!” Vanya says with a smile. 

It was the 3rd or 4th world they created. A story about a young girl finding the hidden society after she ditched school. The gate was open for some reason and she found herself there. She befriended a young boy but then the society was attacked and the gate was closed. She was stuck in the magical society and he was trapped on land. 

The society symbolised the Umbrella Academy and the idea was formed when they wondered what it would be like if they switched places. Ben was hesitant because he didn’t want Vanya to be cursed with his powers, but she replied that the tentacles love her. She wasn’t wrong. 

“What about you?” Ben finally asks, breaking Vanya from her thoughts. 

“I like the one with the girl from another dimension and the stars in the sky was actually a magical path to help her find her way home.” 

“That’s a good one. That was our 6th idea, right?” 

Vanya nods. So far, including the one they’re working on, they’ve created 9 different worlds. 

“I wonder if there’s a way to combine all our worlds,” Vanya mumbles. 

The conversation soon shifts to how different worlds could work together. They discuss which universes match and which clash. They talk about it for hours.

* * *

Vanya begins putting her violin away at 3:30 instead of 5:30. She needs to go shopping after all. Just as she’s pocketed the money and put everything away, she hears footsteps. She looks up and sees Jess, who has become one of Vanya’s only friends. She really wants to introduce her to Ben soon. 

“Packing up early I see. Got some place to be?” Jess asks. 

“Yeah. I’m going clothes shopping for my brother and I. I also need new strings,” Vanya explains. 

“Would you mind if I tagged along?” 

“I would love it if you came,” Vanya says a bit too quickly. 

Jess laughs at her response and proceeds to link their arms. 

“Good! If we have time, maybe we can stop to get coffee?” She asks. 

Vanya’s mind comes to a halt. 

“Sure.” 

Vanya agrees to the maybe-date. 

They walk to the nearest mall and talk about the most random thing. They talk about how Vanya still needs to choose a favorite color because white isn’t a color. They talk about anything and everything and Vanya feels alive. She’ll be sad to leave her new friend( _ she’ll also feel sad and guilty to leave her other siblings behind, but she tries not to think about it), _ but she knows the experience is a good one to have. It might even help her make friendships once she arrives at the west coast. 

“What type of clothes are you shopping for?” Jess asks once they enter the mall. 

“Warm clothes. Winter clothes. Maybe a t-shirt or two.” 

They need to focus on winter clothes. They’ll be able to buy different clothes when the season changes. For now, they need to make sure they won’t freeze. Though Ben and Vanya both agreed that a t-shirt would be nice just to have. 

  
“Yeah, I’ve been wondering. Is the costume all you have to wear?” Jess asks. 

“Yes. Actually, my family and I recently moved here and my clothes were lost during the move. I’ve been stealing my brother’s clothes, but I wear this in public since my brother’s clothes are baggy,” Vanya lies. She feels bad, but she can’t afford to tell Jess the truth.

“Shit, really?! I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise.” Jess seems very upset and it just makes Vanya feel a bit more guilty. 

“And your parents haven’t bought you anything else?” Jess adds, almost as if it was an afterthought.

Vanya shrugs. 

“My dad isn’t the best.”

She leaves it at that. At least it isn’t a lie this time. Jess accepts the answer and gets a faraway look in her eyes. It’s the type of look people get when they’re thinking back on something unpleasant. 

“Before my dad walked out on my mom and I, he wasn’t the best,” She says. 

Vanya doesn’t really know how to react to that. Thankfully, they arrive at the store and Jess’ mood does a 180. 

“I don’t usually like shopping, but you want warm clothes which means they’ll be soft and I love feeling soft clothes,” Jess exclaims as she drags Vanya into the store. 

In the end, Vanya gets 2 sweat-shirts for herself, 2 for Ben, 3 pairs of pants for each, a jacket for each, 3 pairs of wool socks for each, a pair of gloves for each, and a scarf and hat for each. Jess had touched at least 20 other items of clothing. Eventually Vanya had to drag Jess away from the store.

“But it’s all so soft!” Jess protests. 

Vanya sighs but doesn’t comment as she drags them to go buy her strings. She also makes a last minute decision to buy two backpacks since she remembered she and Ben didn’t have packs. That made Jess raise an eyebrow, but she thankfully didn’t comment. 

“So, you have time to get some coffee?” Jess asks. 

Vanya wants to say yes more than anything, but one glance at her watch tells her she has to get going. Especially since she’ll have to sneak into the library to leave the stuff, sneak back out, and then walk through the front door. 

“I’m sorry, I really have to go. My dad will notice if I’m late,” Vanya apologizes. 

“I understand, don’t worry about it. I’ll walk you back to the street corner.”

As they walk back, Vanya can’t help but think about what would’ve happened if she had time to get coffee with Jess. 

* * *

During January, Vanya and Ben are finally ready to enact their plan. Ben miraculously got them fake IDs, they have everything packed, they’ve got money saved up, and they have some canned food ready. As the mission alarm blares, Vanya finds her way to Ben’s room. 

“After this, we’ll get to become Ben Myung and Vanya Vasiliev. You won’t have to use your power to kill and we’ll finally be free,” Vanya says with a smile.

Ben smiles as well. They’d both agreed it’d be best to leave after a mission since everyone would be tired. They were going to convene in her room, where the packs were shoved to the back of her closet. Getting the packs there without being seen had been tricky, but luckily Five had shown them how to loop the security footage when they were 10. 

“Ben! Let’s go!” Luther yells from somewhere in the hallway. 

They say a quick goodbye and Vanya walks back to her room. She plays violin for a while, but she’s giddy with excitement at the thought of leaving. She’s not sure what to do. She can’t focus on her violin and she doesn’t want to get her notebook out of her pack. She thinks to the long night she and Ben have ahead and decides to get some sleep. 

She awakes to the sounds of doors slamming and sobs. She tiredly opens her eyes but she’s soon full of energy as she realizes they’re back. She quickly opens her door but pauses when she sees Diego with his face buried in their mother’s skirt. Allison’s cheeks are stained with tears and Klaus’ door is already closed. It must’ve been the one that slammed. Luther holds onto Allison’s hand and it’s obvious he’s trying to control his emotions. A feeling of dread washes over her. 

“Where’s Ben?” Her voice is small and as Allison begins sobbing again she knows something’s wrong.

“Vanya, sweetie,” her mother begins. Her smile looks pained and Vanya knows that, if she were human, she’d be crying. “Your brother died on the mission”. 

Vanya shakes her head in disbelief as she begins to cry. As the reality of the situation settles, she feels an overwhelming sadness. The weight of the loss of _another_ brother is soul crushing and she collapses to the floor. Her mother quickly gathers her in her arms and Vanya can’t even process her close proximity to Diego and Allison—both of which are also crying into their mother’s blouse—because her brother is **_dead_** and he’s not coming back and how could the universe take _another_ brother from her. 

She doesn’t get any sleep that night. She doesn’t think any of her siblings did. Instead of sleeping, she sobs into Ben’s pack. She holds the clothes she got for him and cries even more because he’ll never get to wear them. She tries to read the two books Ben packed, they were his favorite, but her eyes are too blurry so instead she just holds them and tries to get closer to Ben. 

She feels overwhelming guilt because it was her idea to leave after a mission. She let Ben use his power one last time—the time that  _ killed _ him—instead of leaving earlier in the week. She lost her brother because of their stupid plan to leave during the post-mission exhaustion which would surely take over the entire family. 

She thinks of all the what-ifs and cries. She cries and cries and doesn’t even notice the flickering light because in all her excitement she’d forgotten to take her pills. She doesn’t notice because it feels like a part of her soul has left and she feels hollow and empty and the hole that was created by Five leaving has become bigger. 

* * *

She’s silent through most of the funeral. She hears their father blaming her sibling’s for Ben’s death and she can’t take it. She tells them it’s none of their faults, but they just tell her she wasn’t there. Still, she knows it’s not their fault because she blames herself. 

She’s silent through the next few months. She tried going out to play once, but broke down crying in the middle of it. She cried into Jess’ shoulder and she might’ve told her of Ben’s death or she might’ve not because honestly she’s having trouble remembering anything that’s happened since Ben’s death. 

Everything blurs together until she just can’t take it anymore. During dinner at the end of May, she sets her glass down with more force than necessary, causing her father and siblings to look up at her. 

“I’m leaving. I’ll be going to college. I already know I can get in with my current education levels. You always did keep us ahead of other children,” Vanya says, her voice monotone. “I’ll be leaving next week.” 

Her siblings look at her in shock. They’d all expected either Klaus or Diego to be the first one to leave. Later, Vanya would find out Klaus left only a few weeks after her, but right now she focuses on keeping eye-contact with Reginald. 

“Very well,” He says and even though he seems upset at the interruption, he doesn’t add anything else. 

Ben and Vanya were 15 when they planned on running away together.

Vanya is 16 when she leaves the house alone. 

  
  



	2. Nothing Ever Changes Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanya's life from Ben's death to the apocalypse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, the title is from "This Town" by Kygo ft. Sasha Sloan.

Vanya doesn’t take a lot with her when she leaves. Her biggest attachments to the house had been her brothers, but now 2 of them are gone and she can already see the fractures forming which certainly mean the others will be leaving soon. She doesn’t take a lot, but she can’t find it in her to leave the packs behind. She takes the packs, her violin, and she even stepped into Five’s old room to take his favorite physics book. She takes the dreams and memories which have been shared within the walls of the house. She takes the shared whispers, the promises of safety, the comfort of her siblings, and she leaves. She doesn’t take a lot, but she takes enough. 

Finding an apartment is hard, but she thankfully finds one within the month. She’s thankful to leave the motel she’d been staying at, but the apartment isn’t much better. Still, she has her own space now and she can focus on going to college and getting a job. 

She finds work at a local coffee shop. It’s not much, but it gives her a stable paycheck. She has to wait a few years before going to college because of how expensive it is—she really doesn’t want to rely on her father’s money. 

She doesn’t go to college until she’s 19. 

She takes out student loans and begins studying for a major in music and a minor in  writing. She’s going to have 2 roommates and, while she’s nervous, it’ll be nice to live with other people. As distant as she was with some of her siblings, there was always someone in the house with her. It’s been weird to be alone. 

She gets along well with her roommates. They talk and study together and even occasionally eat together. They ask about the packs full of unworn clothing, but Vanya brushes them off. They respect her space and thankfully don’t question her too much. 

College is hard, but bearable after the academic work she had to do in the Academy. Balancing her work load and violin practice is something she soon masters. Her roommate, Ruby, begs her to reveal her secrets. Andrea, her other roommate, doesn’t have a challenge with the workload. Both of them often help Ruby with her studying. 

As the year goes on, the three of them become close friends. When Vanya’s 20, Ruby reveals that she’s gay. Andrea and Vanya both readily accept her, but it causes Vanya to reflect on her home life. Sexuality had never been a subject that needed to be discussed. It was never any secret to the family that Klaus was gay. Vanya thinks her siblings might not know she’s bi, but that’s only because they never really talked with her. Her friend coming out reminds her that they were sheltered from a lot of things, almost as if their father wanted them to be ignorant to the world around them and simply rely on him. It’s a plausible answer. 

When they graduate, they all celebrate with each other. It’s a bittersweet night because Andrea will be moving back to her own town and Ruby wants to move to Europe. Vanya will be alone again, but she really doesn’t want to think about it. Instead the three of them spend the night getting drunk while doing karaoke. 

Their goodbyes the next morning are filled with tears and promises to stay in contact. 

* * *

She moves into a new apartment at 23 after she graduates. Not even a week passes before Klaus comes knocking on her door at 2 in the morning. 

“Klaus?” 

“Hey Van! I heard you graduated college, congratulations!” 

He holds out his arms for a hug which Vanya easily accepts. She hasn’t seen her brother in years, but seeing him is a nice reminder that he’s alive and okay. It’s a nice reminder that she hasn’t lost any more siblings. 

“Come in! Do you want some tea?” 

He shifts his focus as if listening to someone else talk before he nods. She decides to ignore it and focuses on making the tea. She stares at him as he sits on her couch. She clings to the presence of one of her brothers and it hits her how much she’s missed her siblings. She keeps an eye on him as she makes the tea, as if she’s afraid he’ll disappear.  _ (If she’s being honest with herself, she’s terrified he’ll slip through her fingers).  _

She smiles at him as she brings the tea. He smiles back and she ignores all of the signs that tell her he’s high. 

“What brings you over? Not that I’m not glad you’re here!” 

“Well sister-dearest, I was wondering if I could crash here! Just for a couple of nights of course!” He answers. 

“Klaus, you can stay as long as you’d like,” Vanya says softly. 

He hugs her again, and they linger like that for a while. He’s so much taller than her. While she hasn’t grown at all since leaving the house, he seems to have gained a couple more inches. She thinks for a moment that today might be the first day she’s hugged him since they reached double digits.  _ (She has a vague memory of them hugging when they were young children, around 4, but Reginald soon put a stop to it).  _

“I think I have cards. We could play if you want,” Vanya suggests and even though it’s 2 am and she’s tired, Klaus’ smile makes it worth it. 

He wins every single game they play, much to Vanya’s annoyance. He has a cheshire grin and Vanya suspects he’s cheating in some way, but she doesn’t  _ really _ feel like calling him out. Besides, she has no idea how he could be cheating. 

“Well sister dearest, do you wish to go again?” Klaus asks and, in a rare moment of competitiveness, Vanya says yes because she’s determined to win at least one game. 

She shuffles the deck and doesn’t make a comment as Klaus puts a pill in his mouth. She doesn’t  _ really _ judge him. She knows it keeps the ghosts away and even though she would jump at the chance to have a power, to truly be part of the family, she understands not all her siblings like their powers.  _ (She knows Ben was scared of his powers, she tries to understand that maybe Klaus is scared of his as well).  _

“We should order takeout,” Klaus says suddenly. 

Vanya glances to the clock and slowly glances back at Klaus. He doesn’t seem to be paying attention and she wonders if he even knows what time it is. 

“It’s 4 in the morning. If you’re hungry I could make something, but I’m not going to look for some 24 hour place,” Vanya says. 

“Do you have waffles?” He asks. 

“Only eggos,” She replies.

He stares at the empty space to his left and mumbles a few words before eventually agreeing to have eggos. She smiles and goes to get some ready. 

They eat their eggos while playing more card games. Sadly, Vanya wins none of those games. They play some poker, Go-Fish, and numerous other games but she just can’t win. Eventually, Vanya’s had enough. She’s tired of losing and she’s tired because it’s nearing 4:45 AM. 

“We should get some sleep. I’ll get a blanket for you,” Vanya says. Klaus just nods.

Vanya walks to her room and comes to the realization that she doesn’t really have spare blankets. She looks around her drawers and closet for anything that could be used as a blanket. Her eyes fall to the packs that she still brings with her. She thinks about giving Klaus Ben’s blanket, but decides against it. Instead she grabs the blanket from her pack. She traces the messages which are sewn into her blanket. They’re written in the code she and Ben made and there are matching messages on Ben’s blanket. 

“Let the wind whisper promises of freedom. Let the light of the stars guide you to your true home. Let shared dreams allow you to find comfort in one another,” Vanya whispers. 

The first two messages are a tribute to elements from their favorite worlds while the last is a tribute to their plan to run away. She’d sewn them into the blankets during October as a late birthday gift. 

She takes a shuddering breath, wipes the tears away, and returns to Klaus. He takes the blanket with thanks and if he sees the weird symbols, he doesn’t comment on it. 

She goes to sleep slightly worried Klaus will disappear before she wakes up. Instead, she wakes up to the smell of stir-fry and the sound of talking. She’s instantly nervous, wondering who else was in her apartment. She quickly changes clothing and hesitantly walks to the living room. She sags in relief when she sees it’s just Klaus and Diego. Then she straightens because she has no idea why Diego’s in her house. 

“Hey Van!! I used your phone to call Diego so we could have lunch together! You know, to celebrate you graduating college!” Klaus talks with way too much energy than should be possible considering the amount of sleep they’d both gotten. A quick glance at the clock tells her it’s 11. 

“Hi Diego,” She says, still in a haze from just waking up. Diego nods in response. It’s a good enough answer, so she turns to Klaus.

“How long have you been up? And where did you even get stir-fry?” 

“I’ve been up since 8. You know, I’m not really good at sleeping. I called Diego at 10 and ordered stir-fry and then had Diego pay for the stir-fry!” 

Klaus says it so fast that Vanya barely has time to process everything he said. She knows he has trouble sleeping and wonders if she should’ve offered him something to help him sleep. She’s about to bring it up to him, when her mind processes the second part of his sentence.

“Wait you had Diego pay for it?” She turns to look at Diego. “I’m so sorry. I’ll pay you back.” 

“It’s fine, I don’t mind,” He mutters, not meeting her gaze. “Congratulations by the way”. 

She mumbles a thanks and looks away in embarrassment. She’s never been used to getting compliments, especially not from Diego. 

“I can’t believe our little sister graduated college! The first of the siblings to do so! You’re so good at adulting Van!” Klaus says, pulling her attention towards him. 

She shrugs, unsure what to do with the praise. She says another small thanks before attempting to divert the attention elsewhere. 

“Diego’s in the police academy. I’d say he’s doing pretty good as well,” She says. 

“Damn right I am,” Diego says while smirking. 

He looks at her like he truly appreciates the fact that she knows about it. She may not keep in contact with her siblings, but she checks in with their mother to stay up to date with what all her siblings are doing. When she stops to think about it, that’s probably not the way functional families keep up to date with each other, but then again, her family is the definition of dysfunctional. 

“Just because D’s in the police academy doesn’t mean he’s  _ good _ at adulting,” Klaus protests. 

This causes Diego to turn, glare at Klaus, and throw a vegetable at him. Klaus protests, saying it’s not fair, while throwing some rice at Diego. Vanya smiles at the familiarity of the scene. 

“Van! You should play something for us,” Klaus says, breaking away from the staring contest. 

“I don’t know…” Vanya begins.

“You should. We grew up hearing you play, but now it’s been 7 years since we’ve last heard you,” Diego adds. 

It’s not entirely true. Once, when she was 18 and before she went to college, Klaus had stopped by her old apartment and she played for him. Though there’s no way for Diego to know that unless Klaus told him. 

Vanya looks between the two and sees the resolve in their eyes. They both want to hear her play and they’re both very stubborn. It’s best not to argue with them.

“I guess it’d be good to practice. Especially since I’m auditioning for an orchestra tomorrow”. 

Klaus brightens when she mentions the audition and Diego looks  _ slightly _ intrigued which probably means he’s happy for her but is too stubborn to admit to having feelings. 

Diego stops by more often after that. 

* * *

After a month she and Klaus have fallen into a routine. She comes home from either the orchestra or her part-time job and Klaus will be there half the time. If he is there, she’ll make some food and they’ll play either cards or a board game, which she bought since Klaus was staying with her, and she’ll later practice the violin. 

Vanya’s honestly surprised Klaus has stayed this long. She’s happy, oh so happy, that he’s staying with her, but she’s still surprised. She enjoys their talks and, even though he cheats, she enjoys playing cards with him. He’s been really supportive as well. He cheers every time she plays violin and is encouraging her to start teaching. She tells him she’ll think about it. 

She smiles upon reaching the door, hoping he’ll be home. She was nervous to live alone again—after her childhood she has a hard time dealing with solitude—and it’s nice to have someone be home when she arrives. 

“Klaus?” She asks when she opens the door. 

There’s no response, but she hears a shuffling in the bedroom. Carefully, she sets her violin case down. She grabs the knife Diego has been insistent on her keeping and quietly walks to her bedroom. 

“Klaus?” She asks again. 

She looks into her bedroom and sighs in relief when she sees Klaus. She then notices the state her room is in and she looks at Klaus in confusion.

“Why were you going through my stuff?” 

Klaus looks up from the book he’s holding. He looks the slightest bit guilty which, honestly, he should be. Vanya looks around her room in dismay. The drawers are open, the sheets are on the floor, and the packs and their contents are on the floor. 

_ Oh.  _

He saw the packs. She instantly becomes defensive. It doesn’t look like he’s read any of the notebooks, but she can never be too sure. It’s a bit silly, but she’s also upset he even went through the packs. It’s always been something that seemed sacred to her and Ben; as if it was meant for their eyes only. 

“I was looking for drug money,” He admits softly. 

She feels betrayal seep into bones. It weaves its way around her soul and she feels her heart break because  _ of course _ Klaus would use her for drug money. She doesn’t know why she thought he’d stay with her otherwise. 

“I’m sorry,” He whispers. 

_ Oh.  _

“Just don’t do it again,” She mumbles. “Did you read the notebooks?” She asks, changing the subject before he can reply. 

He looks upset at the subject change, but ultimately accepts it. He shakes his head and instead turns back to the book in his hands. It’s one of the books Ben had packed. 

“I didn’t really care about them, I was just looking for money. Then I saw this book! It’s Ben’s favorite you know. Of course you know, it’s his copy. That’s probably why you took it, right?” 

Vanya nods and the conversation is left at that. Together the two of them clean up her room. She carefully puts everything back in the two packs. She opens Ben’s notebook, just to look at his handwriting again, before packing it away. 

“I should probably leave soon,” Klaus says. 

Vanya frowns. She’s upset Klaus tried to steal from her for  _ drugs _ of all things, but she doesn’t want him to leave. She closes the closet and turns to look at him. 

“I don’t want to bother you and I might try to steal from you again,” He elaborates. 

“You don’t have to leave. I like your company,” She says. 

Klaus lets out a laugh that sounds a bit too forced and looks away. Vanya’s frown deepens. She begins to walk over to him, but he moves away and begins fixing the bed sheets. 

“You’ll get tired of me soon, sister-dearest. Don’t worry too much! I’ll still pop in from time to time since you obviously can’t go long without my wonderful presence! I just won’t stay long enough to annoy you”. Klaus’ voice is cheerful, but Vanya can tell it’s fake cheerful. 

“Look, we’ll talk about the stealing thing later. I like your company. Please don’t leave,” Vanya begs. 

He doesn’t answer. 

He’s gone by morning and doesn’t show up for weeks. 

* * *

In the 4 months following Klaus leaving, he’s popped by a total of 14 times and stayed the night 5 of those times. Vanya wishes he’d visit more—she wishes he’d stay longer—but she’s happy to at least be talking to him. Her life is becoming monotone. 

Diego still stops by. His visits don’t always correspond with Klaus’, but more often than not they do. 2 weeks ago he and Klaus had been over for them to celebrate their shared birthday. They’d ordered take-out, gotten donuts, played some board games, and ended up watching one of Allison’s films. It’d been a stupid plot, but it was nice to see their sister again—even if it was on a screen. 

Vanya’s not really expecting Diego and Klaus to barge into her apartment while teaching a student. She’s certainly not expecting them to just open the door with no warning. Her student jumps in alarm and she’s quick to calm her down. 

Diego has a scowl on his face, a split lip, a swollen cheek, and bloodied knuckles. Klaus is guiding him to the bathroom. Soon the door closes and Vanya and her student are left in a stunned silence. 

Vanya apologizes and they only get 10 more minutes of practice before Diego is storming out of her bathroom and out of her apartment without a word. Klaus follows but not before shooting a sympathetic glance to her. 

“He got kicked out of the academy after a nasty fight,” He says and then he’s gone. 

After the student leaves she tries over and over again to get in contact with them. They don’t answer. It goes on for nearly 2 months. Neither of them have come to her apartment and Diego isn’t responding to her messages. She knows he probably needs space, but it doesn’t stop her from feeling lonely and angry. It doesn’t stop her from noticing the deafening silence that lingers in her apartment. 

Perhaps that’s the reason she bought the red typewriter she’d seen in a window. She had been walking back to her apartment, still so lonely and angry, when she’d seen some old comics of the Umbrella Academy. The typewriter was beside them and in an impulsive decision, she’d bought it.

She began writing the moment she entered her house. When she was younger, she’d created worlds to escape. She’d written fictional adventures to help her cope with her situation. Now, she writes an autobiography. She writes about the constant loneliness and the feeling of never being good enough. She writes about her horrible father and all the terrible things he did. She doesn’t  _ really _ mean to antagonize her siblings. She knows they were just kids and that they were all going through a lot, but she’s feeling betrayed by the lack of contact from Klaus and Diego so she writes about all the times she’d felt betrayed by her siblings as children. 

She regrets it the moment it’s published. She regrets it the moment she sees Klaus’ tear stained face at her door as he says one final goodbye and one final apology. She regrets it the moment Diego yells and yells at her and never contacts her again. She regrets it the moment she watches Allison try to deflect question after question about it in her interviews. She regrets it constantly and eventually she stops all the readings. She hides herself in her room and only leaves to go to the orchestra and when she needs to teach. 

Night after night she re-reads her book, wondering where she went wrong. She hadn’t meant to make her relationship with her siblings worse. She hadn’t meant to hurt her siblings, yet part of her screamed that they should apologize to her for hurting her, not the other way around. She hates that part of herself. 

She takes another pill as she re-reads a section she’d written about Ben. She’d left out the part about their escape and only briefly mentioned their meet-ups. When she had written about it, she mentioned the nights on the roofs. She never mentioned the library, that’s still too sacred. 

As she reads and reads Ben’s chapter, she feels the familiar guilt gnaw at her conscience. She takes a deep breath and forces her eyes away from the page. 

Suddenly, she’s struck with an idea. She’s always used writing as a way to make her feel better, so that’s what she’ll do. Except this time, there will be no mistakes. 

She shuffles out of her bed and to her closet to obtain her story notebooks. The notes are messy and obscure in some places, but she can make it work. She begins merging some of the 11 universes to the point where she has 4 main story ideas. From there, she begins fleshing out characters and backstories. She strengthens the history behind the universes and soon she’s written the first draft of a fantasy novel. It’s not the longest and definitely not part of a series, but she’s happy. 

After months and months of working, she sends it to a publisher under the name “Vanya Vasiliev” because she will not let the stories she and Ben made be tainted by being associated with her autobiography. 

She’s not expecting much when it publishes, but it’s picked up a sizable audience for her first book. Feeling inspired, she begins writing another novel. She plans it out into three parts thus making it a trilogy. By the age of 25, she publishes the first part of the trilogy. The trilogy is a wonderful combination of Vanya’s favorite universe and the universe that was Ben’s favorite, along with a couple others. 

The story is centered around 2 characters. The main heroine was born in the flying city of  _ Aerolis.  _ She’d fallen through the open gateway and was lost so her parents created the stars to help her find her way home. The main hero is her twin brother who had lived his entire life in the flying city. One day, when walking through a forest, the main heroine walks into a ring of flowers which is actually a gateway. She explores the city and becomes friends with the hero, but soon there’s an attack and the heroine is stuck in the sky while the hero is stuck on land. 

It’s not the most original idea, but surprisingly by time the second book comes out, when Vanya is 26, it picks up popularity and becomes a bestseller. 

She enjoys writing as much as she enjoys playing the violin and it soon becomes an extension of her. She’s already begun publishing her 2nd trilogy series when she finds out her father died. It’s an unpleasant surprise to say the least, if only because it means she'll have to return to the house.

* * *

The funeral sucks. The only good part is the return of Five. Other than that, it’s just a painful reminder of all the suffering that occured in the house. It becomes a painful reminder of the broken hopes and dreams she shared with Ben. She can’t even look in the direction of his statue. 

Allison tries to connect with her which is nice, but everytime Klaus ignores her and every hurtful comment Diego makes outweighs the good her sister brings. Five’s return should be enough to make the good outweigh the bad, but he’s talking about an apocalypse. He’s also gone when she wakes up and that painfully reminds her of Klaus.

Leonard is a light that fills her world and makes her feel loved. He’s kind and he listens and he’s everything she needs. He knows what to say and he’s always there for her. He fills the emptiness left by her family and he’s so perfect she doesn’t even see the red flags. 

She doesn’t really notice until he’s pulling her away from Allison and  _ omg she killed her. She killed her sister.  _ She doesn’t understand why he doesn’t just let her stay with Allison. She  _ needs _ to save Allison because she still remembers what it was like to lose her brothers and she  **_can’t_ ** lose her sister. 

The next thing she knows she’s in a bathtub and Leonard is there and they’re nowhere near Allison and they just  _ left _ her there to bleed out. Part of Vanya screams the warning Allison gave her about Leonard or Harold but she can’t even process that because her  _ sister  _ is  _ dead _ and it’s her fault. 

She doesn’t really process the threat Leonard( _ Harold) _ holds until she finds her father’s book. She’s vaguely aware of telling him that she loves her family _ (and it’s true) _ and then she’s staring at his dead body. These lost memories are a little concerning, but she needs to focus on getting home. 

She cries into Luther’s arms and she’s so relieved that he understands that she would never want to hurt Allison and she’s so relieved that Allison is alive and— and then he’s choking her. He’s hurting her and she can’t breathe but he won’t let go and she begins to panic before it’s black again. 

She wakes up in a dark cell that’s so achingly familiar that she begins crying again. She sees her brothers standing there and she doesn’t understand why they won’t let her out. Klaus and Diego might be arguing with Luther or they might be agreeing. She can’t really tell because she can’t breathe. Allison is there and she seems upset but Vanya can’t tell if she’s upset with Luther or with herself. 

Soon her siblings are leaving and she doesn’t exactly remember how but she’s leaving too. She walks through the halls of the house and she might be destroying the house but, again, she can’t really tell. 

She kills Pogo. 

Oh god she killed Pogo.  **_(He deserved it he deserved it he deserved it he deserved it)_ ** . She tries to ignore that voice. 

She’s getting ready for the concert and even though she doesn’t know how she got back to her apartment she’s happy because she can’t hurt anyone at the concert. She’ll get to play and hopefully her siblings will watch give her prideful smiles as they realise she doesn’t want to hurt anyone. Everything will go back to normal and they’ll be able to be a real family. 

Her siblings do show up. She sees Allison smile at her and everything is okay because her sister loves her and she loves her sister. Suddenly she’s being attacked and her body moves on her own because she  _ just wants to finish her concert.  _ **_Why can’t her siblings let her have this one thing?_ **

Suddenly she’s glowing and she feels  _ alive _ . She can hear everything and she’s truly connected with the world. She’s more than just a person. She’s a force of nature and she’s  _ beautiful  _ and  **_powerful._ **

She’s becoming one with the universe and this is where she truly belongs. She is a  **_god_ ** and she can spread this beauty to the world. She can share what the universe  _ really _ sounds like through her music. 

Through the corner of her eye she sees a glowing blue silhouette of  _ Ben _ and she could cry because now she can show him her newfound place in the world. She can play him the songs of the oceans they desperately wanted to see. She can share with him the  _ essence _ of the freedom they yearned for. 

She can feel his energy and  **_finally_ ** all her siblings are back together. 

She can reshape the universe so they’ll  **_always be together._ **

She can do this because she has  **_ascended above her siblings._ **

She can share with them her new-found understanding of the universe and she’s so excited to finally share something with her siblings. 

They’re trying to kill her.

_ They’re trying to kill her.  _

**_They’re Trying To KILL HER._ **

She pushes them away with her powers and connects them with her energy. She feels their life forces and they’re truly becoming one. They’re life is being absorbed by her and soon they will be  **_one being_ ** and they’ll explore the secrets of the universe  **_together_ ** . 

Together they’ll form mountains and rivers. 

They’ll reshape the world into the perfect symphony and there will no longer be the need for individual identity because everything will become a part of her and she will become a part of  **_everything_ ** . 

There’s a gunshot. 

Her sense of hearing is messed up.

She’s  **_losing her connection with the world._ **

**_She wants it to STOP._ **

**_SHE WANTS TO STAY ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE._ **

Everything goes dark.

She passes out. 

The moon shatters and comes crashing down.

Fires begin to ravage the Earth. 

Billions die. 

She causes the apocalypse. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really enjoyed writing White Violin!Vanya. 
> 
> I hope the pacing at the end wasn't too weird. 
> 
> There will be more Ben next chapter! I promise! It will probably be the same length as this one, but I think the fourth chapter will be longer. The fourth chapter will hopefully be longer.


	3. I Don’t Want to Live My Life in Circles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben's thoughts from the time of his death to the apocalypse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do hope you enjoy this chapter. I enjoyed writing it and it's the longest chapter in the fic so far. 
> 
> Again, title is from the song "This Town" by Kygo ft. Sasha Sloan
> 
> Once again, I hope the pacing was okay.

Ben’s afraid. That’s the first thing his mind processes. He can’t control The Horror. He always has trouble but he just  _ can’t _ pull them back in. There’s no more bad guys in the room for the horror to destroy, but it still won’t settle. It’s still out for blood. 

The Horror turns on him. 

Ben’s in pain. He thinks he might be screaming but he’s not sure. He feels his skin tearing apart. He feels his bones shift and break under his skin and he just wants it to  _ stop.  _ He feels the horror squeeze against his body, against its vessel, and he briefly wonders if it understands this will mean it can’t kill anymore. 

The attack doesn’t stop. It doesn’t stop even as he feels the cold air brush against his organs—organs which never should have seen the light of day. It doesn’t stop even as he feels the horror squeeze painfully around his heart, but never enough to kill him. It’s taking its time killing him. 

He can’t breathe. He can’t breathe because he’s choking on his blood and he’s choking on the tentacles which are moving around his body in places it shouldn’t be. He stopped screaming a while ago because The Horror tore out his vocal cords. He’s not sure how many limbs he has left; he’s not even sure how many organs are intact. 

Then it stops. Everything stops and The Horror’s gone and he can’t even process the excruciating pain anymore. There might be shouting, probably from his siblings, but it’s like he’s underwater and he can’t properly hear anything. He sees silhouettes in the corner of his vision but that’s fading out too.  _ (He can’t feel his siblings cling to him because his nerves have been mercilessly torn apart).  _

His vision fades except for a few white dots that remind him of stars, of lights strung up in the sky, and his first _ (and last)  _ thought is, 

_ Oh.  _

_ Are you here to guide me home?  _

Then he dies. 

He wakes up. 

It’s less of waking up and more a state of being. He doesn’t really have a body and he feels like energy more than anything. He can’t  _ see _ because he doesn’t have eyes, but he  _ knows _ there’s a light in front of him. Even though he doesn’t have ears, he hears a voice telling him to go to the light. 

But he’s scared. 

He’s scared and he thinks he might be dead, but he doesn’t  _ want  _ to be dead. He doesn’t want to be dead because he already misses his siblings and he doesn’t know how he and Vanya would’ve survived without them. He wants to tell her that they should take their siblings with them, or at least come back for them, when he remembers he can’t because even if he doesn’t want to admit it he’s  _ dead.  _

He doesn’t want to be dead. Vanya’s waiting for him and they had new clothes he didn’t even get to try. He doesn’t want to be dead because they were going to have a beautiful house by the ocean. They’d stay at a hotel first until they could buy an apartment, but once they got enough money they’d move to their house and have a wonderful view. They’d open a book shop and even tell the stories they created. 

He doesn’t want to be dead because there was so much he had left to do. When he was younger, he wouldn’t have cared if he died. He wouldn’t have cared because being dead means he doesn’t have to hurt anyone nor use his powers. Now, he wants to explore. He wants to learn how to swim and he wants to get 5 cats with Vanya which they’d name after their siblings. He wants to learn piano so he can play with Vanya and he wants to have his chance at a normal life with his sister who he’s left  _ all alone _ because none of their siblings pay attention to her. 

He hears _ (except he doesn’t because he’s dead and doesn’t have ears) _ the voice again, this time a little louder. He pushes against it because he doesn’t want to go. He wants to stay and wake up from this horrible nightmare. He wants to wake up in his room after the mission. He wants to wake up to Vanya shaking him with barely contained excitement because they were supposed to escape  _ today _ , but now they’ll never be able to. 

He feels a pull. It doesn’t feel like someone grasping him, because he has no physical form, but it’s like an energy he’s drawn to. It’s like someone else is calling him and it seems much nicer than the voice telling him to go to the light. He turns away from the light _ (not literally, he still can’t see the light. He simply blocks it from his mind)  _ and follows the pull. He follows it until he has actual eyes and until he sees—

“Klaus?” 

They’re outside, in the courtyard, and there’s a horrible statue that wasn’t there before. It’s snowing and he knows he should be cold but he isn’t. It’s unsettling. He doesn’t like it. He can see things again, but it feels wrong. It takes him a moment to realize that he isn’t actually breathing and he can’t actually feel anything. Still, it’s a better alternative than going to the light so he stays with Klaus. 

He never considers going to the light again. 

* * *

Ben’s first few months of death are horrible. They’re more than horrible. Death is worse than he could’ve ever imagined. He’s not able to interact with anyone or anything other than Klaus. He’s thankful to have Klaus, but he watches his other siblings tear themselves apart and he can’t do anything. He hates it.

He watches Luther train extra hard to the point where he passes out. He watches Luther train to be a ‘better leader’ because he thinks he failed Ben. Ben wants to tell him it’s not his fault. He screams and screams and tries to throw things, but nothing ever works. He feels helpless.

He watches Diego put up an angry front. He watches as Diego throws knives at the wall and punches his sorrow out. Ben’s spent hours looking at the broken walls, his hands hovering above the marks. He hears Diego struggle to say his name, constantly stuttering out apologies. Ben wants to help; wants to remind him that he just needs to picture the word in his mind. Ben wants him to know he has nothing to apologize for. 

He watches Allison cover up the bags under her eyes with make-up. He watches her put on a smiling face and pretends she’s alright. He sits _ (hovers)  _ on her bed every night when she repeats  _ I heard a rumor Ben’s still alive _ over and over again. He desperately wants the rumor to come true so he can give her a hug and comfort her. He wants to reassure her and tell her he’s still here. 

He initially thought it was a good thing Klaus summoned him. Klaus would be able to tell the others and Ben would be able to get Klaus sober. It didn’t work. Klaus tried one time to tell their siblings and he was high. Ben had desperately begged Klaus to get sober for this, because he’s not supposed to be able to see ghosts when he’s high, but Klaus shrugged him off. He’s thankful to be able to talk to someone, but Klaus is always high and he  _ never listens.  _

Ben watches as Vanya stays in the house. He screams at her to run away to that wonderful ocean town they dreamed of. He tells her that he’ll follow—that he’ll convince Klaus to go with her— and then they can all be happy. 

Ben watches as Vanya becomes a shell. At night she cries into his clothes _ (his clothes that he’ll never get to wear) _ or attempts to read his books. Some nights she just traces over the stitches in his blanket. During the day she absentmindedly writes messages in their secret code. He thinks most of their messages would be a better quote for his statue. 

Ben watches her go through the days on autopilot and he worries she’ll be like this forever. 

He cries when she says she’s leaving. He shouts and cries and he’s so happy she’s finally getting out of here. Klaus raises an eyebrow at him, but he ignores that. Later, he convinces Klaus to leave as well and his death might just be looking up. 

* * *

Ben checks up on his siblings as much as possible. Allison’s gone off to LA and he’s never tried traveling that far from Klaus. He’s not sure he wants to try _ (he’s scared he’ll run into the light).  _ He doesn’t visit Luther a lot because he’s still in that house and Ben hates going back there. 

Diego’s doing well in the police academy and Vanya’s doing well in college. Ben begs Klaus to visit either of them. He sometimes visits Diego, but he’s never even gotten close to Vanya’s college campus. 

“She’s doing fine on her own, Benjamin.” He often says. 

Ben disagrees. 

She’s become friends with her roommates, but he watches as she looks up at the moon and says goodnight to  _ all  _ her siblings, even the ones who have ignored her. He sits in the corner of the dinner she’s currently working at and sees the faraway look in her eyes—the look that’s imagining a different life. 

Things get better over time. She gets even closer to her roommates and she can turn to them when she needs to cry. Ben feels a bit better after that. She’s moving on from his death and, even though he can’t blame her, it hurts because he’s  _ still here _ .  _ (He ignores the fact that he seems to be moving on from his death as well).  _

He and Klaus become closer. It’s to be expected—Ben doesn’t really have anyone else he can talk to. Klaus doesn’t really have anyone else either. They open up to each other. They talk about their trauma and comfort each other even if they can’t physically interact. 

Ben learns about the mausoleum. It becomes yet another reason he hates Reginald Hargreeves. He swears that man never should have been allowed near children. Klaus wholeheartedly agrees and makes a toast to that. 

Klaus learns about Ben’s fear of The Horror in more depth. He explains that it wasn’t always as bad, but Reginald kept pushing for it to be used to kill more and more and it just caused the blood lust to grow. They think that if anyone is to blame for Ben’s death, it’s Reginald. 

Ben picks up on Klaus’ humor. He becomes louder even though only one person can hear him. He makes more sarcastic jokes that only Klaus will laugh at, but it’s enough. 

He still tries to get Klaus sober. Klaus still doesn’t listen to him. It’s okay though _ (it really isn’t because he’s terrified for Klaus) _ , because he keeps track of what he’s taking so Klaus can help paramedics if needed. He keeps an eye out for places to sleep and stands guard to tell Klaus in case someone sneaks up on him. 

Sometimes, rarely, Klaus will go to a library so Ben can read. Ben’s tried to read over the shoulders of strangers, but sometimes they flip the page too quickly. Klaus will flip exactly when Ben needs him to and sometimes he’ll even read along with Ben. Ben likes those days. 

Klaus always takes Ben into consideration when they get something to eat. He’ll ask what Ben wants even though Ben can’t eat. It’s the sentiment that matters and it touches Ben more than he’ll ever admit. 

They become each other’s best friends and tell each other  _ (almost) _ everything, even if Ben barely has any secrets to tell. He has no life of his own to gossip about. He does bring the juiciest gossip about strangers to Klaus, and Klaus appreciates it. Sometimes they go to the park just so they can learn the tea.  _ (Ben stopped thinking about the morals behind eavesdropping long ago).  _

He never mentions the almost-escape. He doesn’t mention the little spot in the library nor does he mention the stories. Part of this is because of the guilt. Klaus, and the others, were all suffering so much and he and Vanya were going to leave them behind. He knows they were young and didn’t talk to their siblings often, but he still feels guilt thinking about it. 

He also never mentions it because it’s something that was so special and important to him and Vanya that he just can’t share it. To this day he can’t let others in on the secret. So much had been taken from Vanya when she was a child—her self confidence is one example—and she deserves to own this one thing.  _ (He also selfishly wants to keep it because it was also  _ his _ and he wants it to stay that way).  _

Even through all the bonding they’ve had, Ben sometimes finds Klaus infuriating. This usually occurs when Klaus is higher than normal and/or completely ignores him. During these times, Ben often checks on his siblings. Sometimes he checks on Diego and sometimes he checks on Vanya. Occasionally he’ll sneak into a movie theatre and watch one of Allison’s movies. Very rarely, he’ll check on Luther through the windows of the house. 

Today he chooses Vanya. He goes to her college first, but she’s not there. He frowns, but ultimately he waits. Her things are all packed and he’s confused. He looks around the dorm for clues and finally his eyes land on a calendar. Today’s date is circled in red and there’s small, neat handwriting _ (Vanya’s handwriting) _ that says ‘Graduation’ along with a very enthusiastic ‘Yay’ which is written in different handwriting. 

He missed her graduation. 

Ben doesn’t know why, but he’s so upset that he missed it. He knows none of their siblings would’ve known which means she graduated and no family showed up. It’s like they’re kids again, little Vanya ignored by her family. 

Ben’s upset with himself for not being there, even if she hadn’t been able to see him. He would’ve congratulated her and he would’ve told her how proud he was _ (because he’s so proud that she’s made a life—even if it’s not the one they dreamed).  _

The door opens and Ben doesn’t even jump in surprise. He used to when he first died. Whenever their mother came to check on one of his siblings he’d jump because they’d never been allowed in each other’s rooms at night. Now he just calmly looks at who’s entering. 

It’s Vanya and her roommates and they’re drunk. Very drunk. Ben’s concerned—he’s never seen Vanya this drunk. Not that he sees her a lot. At least, Ben notes, she looks happy. She looks happy and she looks  _ proud _ of herself. It reminds him of when she’d figure out a difficult piece on her violin and when she first began making money for their escape. He smiles. 

Then she starts crying. 

And Ben begins to panic. 

He panics because he doesn’t know why she’s suddenly crying and her friends are crying too so he doesn’t know how much help they’ll be. Klaus is too high to care that his sister is crying in her college dorm after graduating even though she should be happy. 

He hears her say something about missing her friends and about being alone again.

He understands. 

Vanya’s been alone her whole life and now she finally has friends but, from what he understands, they’re moving away and she’ll be alone again. With that thought, he makes up his mind. He goes back to Klaus and, in the morning, he tells him about Vanya’s graduation. 

It takes a week for them to finally go to her apartment. It took days to find where she lives and then it took days to convince Klaus to go. He points out that Klaus needs a place to stay anyway and that it’ll be beneficial for everyone. 

They arrive at 2 AM. 

It’s a little late and Vanya looks tired, but she readily welcomes them in. It takes no convincing for her to let Klaus stay the night and when she mentions he’s welcome to stay as long as he’d like, Ben knows he’ll do everything he can to get Klaus to stay as long as possible. 

* * *

They stay for a month. It’s a wonderful month and even Diego pops in from time to time. Ben’s not sure he’s ever seen Klaus this happy and Vanya smiles a lot more. They’re not waking up to a beautiful ocean breeze and they’re not getting tea at a local shop that knows their order by heart every morning, but he’s content. He’s  _ happy _ because his siblings are together and Klaus isn’t sleeping in alley-ways and Vanya isn’t crying herself to sleep. 

Then Klaus needs drug money. 

Ben tells him not to do it. Ben  _ begs  _ him not to do it, but it makes no difference. Klaus tears through Vanya’s bedroom and Ben’s about to wait outside for Vanya, but Klaus begins going through their old packs and his heart just breaks. 

He stares wordlessly at his old notebooks. He can picture the words in his mind. He remembers the plan perfectly and even remembers the old code. He bends down and reaches for the notebook, but his hands phase through. He frowns and turns back to Klaus, only to find him staring at one of Ben’s favorite books. 

“This is your book! Look, it even has your name scribbled on it,” Klaus says with a smile. 

Ben smiles too and the door opens. His movements halt and his heart drops when he hears Vanya call for Klaus. Klaus moves the backpack away as he suddenly prefers to look at the cover of the book. 

Vanya enters the room. 

Klaus leaves the next morning despite Ben asking him to stay. 

* * *

They read Vanya’s book together while Klaus is at rehab. Klaus is upset and Ben can see the unshed tears in his eyes. And Ben? Ben is fucking furious. He can’t believe their sister, sweet little Vanya, would say such things.  _ (She doesn’t ever mention their escape or their spot in the library and he’s grateful for that).  _

He’s angry and for the first time in his life _ (more like his existence) _ he wants to yell at her. He wants to demand answers, but when Klaus confronts her he just smiles sadly with tears on his face and says goodbye. 

Ben takes one last lingering look and is hit in the gut when he sees Vanya’s eyes which are filled with such guilt and regret. He’s still angry at her, he has a feeling he’ll be angry for a very long time because she doesn’t understand what Klaus went through and she just talked about how she was left alone her entire life, but he still doesn’t like to see her hurt. He’s never liked to see any of his siblings hurt. 

He stops visiting her. His anger faded years ago, but he still hasn’t forgiven her. He’s not sure what he’ll feel if he ever were to visit her, so he just doesn’t. 

He’d be 27 if he were still alive when he sees the book in a bookshop window. The design catches his eye first, because he once drew something that looked very similar to the art on the cover. He moves closer and reads the words on the cover.  _ Tales of Aerlis: Equilibrium by Vanya Vasiliev.  _ He brings a hand to his mouth and then notices it’s the third book in the series. In the display, slightly behind the book, are the first two, both with cover art which is painfully familiar.  _ Tales of Aerlis: Lost  _ and  _ Tales of Aerlis: Freedom _ . 

“Ben?” He hears Klaus call from further away. 

“What’s caught your eye, Benny-boo?” Klaus asks and Ben can’t even get upset by the nickname because he  _ knows _ these stories and, even if they could very well be changed and combined, they’re familiar. 

“We need to get those books. Wait, you don’t have money, we need to go to a library and find these books.  _ Please _ Klaus,” Ben pleads. 

Klaus looks confused, but must see the desperation in Ben’s eyes so he agrees. After Klaus buys more drugs, they head to the library they often go to and find the books. As Klaus is checking the books out, the librarian recommends another book written by the same author and goes to get it for them. While she’s gone, Klaus turns on Ben. 

“What’s this about Ben? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look at a book with such longing. You usually save that look for when you want to hug one of our siblings, or a really cute cat, but can’t,” Klaus says. 

Ben doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t want to lie to Klaus because he loves him and lying would feel dirty and wrong. He doesn’t want to lie because Klaus  _ trusts _ him and he doesn’t want to betray that trust. On the other hand, he knows that since Vanya published it under ‘Vasiliev’ she doesn’t want their siblings knowing. She doesn’t want the  _ world _ knowing and he can’t betray that either. 

He gestures vaguely to the author’s name and his thoughts wander to Vanya. He remembers the regret in her eyes from the last time he saw her, and he wonders if this is her way of separating two aspects of her life. He doesn’t blame her for not wanting the story to be associated with her autobiography. 

“So, you saw our sister’s name and, even though it’s not her who wrote it, you wanted to get it?” Klaus raises an eyebrow at him. “If you miss her that much you could just go visit her. Or is this your way of pretending that her book wasn’t as bad as it was, because I’m all for that!” He finishes with a fake cheer. 

Ben doesn’t correct him. The librarian returns at that moment with the other novel. They check out the books and find a nice cafe to settle in. Klaus reads the summary on the back of the book and Ben smiles because the summary is very familiar. 

“Seems kind of intriguing. Definitely better than the book  _ our _ Vanny wrote,” Klaus says.

He opens the book to the dedication page and—

Oh. 

_ Oh.  _

_ “To my deceased brother who brought entire universes to life with me. I love you.”  _

Ben lets out a choked sob. Klaus turns to look at him with a questioning gaze and Ben  _ knows _ he’s connecting the dots because Klaus is not as stupid as some people would think, but he thankfully doesn’t say anything. Ben knows Klaus has figured out it  _ was _ their Vanya who wrote the book, but as long as he doesn’t mention it then Ben can pretend. 

They read it together. It’s a wonderful story and wonderfully written. Ben almost forgets that Vanya got her college minor in creative writing. Now that Ben is reading some of her writing that  _ isn’t _ saying a lot of hurtful things, he can see what a good writer she actually is. Klaus also seems to be enjoying himself and together they share a lot of sarcastic remarks about their least favorite characters. Both of them hate the main villain and maybe it’s because he’s similar to Reginald _ (it’s definitely because of that) _ , but they enjoy hating on him nonetheless. On the other hand, they both have different favorite characters and argue a lot about which one is the best. 

“Ben. Ben, Ben, Ben. Obviously the best character in the series is Aeryn! She’s a badass knight who fights for Aerlis and is a keeper of the sentient wind currents! And she has a girlfriend who she treats  _ right _ ! Everything about her is perfect!” Klaus argues. 

Ben makes a  _ tsk _ sound as he shakes his head. 

“All that may be true, Klaus, but even she cannot compare with Kino. They’re such a supportive friend to Vera(the main character) and they helped her in that one magical battle when they don’t even have magic. They put alcohol in a bottle, lit it on fire, and threw it at the enemy! They’re kind, creative, AND badass!” 

Debates like these occur a lot. They both cry when characters they like die and they both cheer when characters they hate die. They both fall in love with the series and Ben already knows that Klaus is going to log into his tumblr and start discourse in the fandom as soon as possible _ (and there is a fandom as they were happy to find out).  _

Ben cries when the other main character, Bailey, dies. He cries because there had never been so much death in their stories and there had certainly never been a death of a main character and it just shows how Vanya’s world view is now vs. when they were teenagers. He knows Bailey was the character based off him and he’s happy Bailey’s death was at least painless. 

Klaus rants on his tumblr. Klaus rants on his tumblr about how unfair it was that Bailey AND Aeryn died in the same battle. Ben takes some time to process the series after they’ve finished and decides he just  _ needs _ to check on Vanya. He leaves after an hour of Klaus showing him fanart he found online,mostly from twitter and tumblr, of the characters. As he leaves, he hears one last shout from Klaus.

“WHY ISN’T THERE ANY GOOD FANFIC OF HER BEING A BADASS?!” 

Just another day with Klaus. Ben just hopes he doesn’t attract enough attention to get his phone stolen. He got it from money that he borrowed _ (stole) _ from either Allison’s bank account or their father’s account. Shaking the thoughts from his head, it really doesn’t matter where Klaus got the money, he continues to Vanya’s. 

He’s not sure what he expects when he enters Vanya’s apartment again. There’s more decorations this time, some fanart and fan letters are framed and hung up on the walls. He smiles at the sight. There’s a red typewriter that he has a love-hate relationship with. It was used to write the nightmare that was the autobiography, but it also was used to write his—and Klaus’—new favorite series. 

He walks over to it, and sees a couple of pages have been written for, presumably, another series. Ben grins at the thought and feels more excitement than he expected. He always wanted to share their stories and he felt happy that Vanya was doing it. 

Vanya isn’t home, and that’s really a shame, so he decides to go back to Klaus. He takes one last look at the apartment. He smiles fondly at the notebooks full of story ideas all those years ago. He smiles at the fairy lights which are strung up on her ceiling like stars. He smiles at the little notes written in code. They’re small things like a shopping list and a reminder for a dentist appointment. They’re small things and have nothing to do with escaping, but Ben smiles at the sight of her writing in their code just for the sake of it. 

He goes back to Klaus. Klaus makes him read the 400 word fanfic he wrote while he was gone and, even though it has horrible grammar and horrible pacing, it makes Ben smile because Klaus seems so proud of it. 

_ (A part of Ben smiles because he knows he forgives Vanya now and he’s happy Vanya’s doing better).  _

* * *

The funeral sucks. The weather sucks and Luther and Diego get in a fight. The only good things are that Five’s back and Ben’s statue is gone. Ben’s always hated that statue. 

He also hates the masked assassins who kidnap Klaus and torture him. He hates that none of their siblings even notice that Klaus is gone. He hates that he knows Klaus will brush off the entire experience after it’s over. 

Diego’s cop friend dies and Klaus disappears. This week is turning into a mess. Klaus shows up again and he learns about Dave and the 10 months Klaus spent in Vietnam. Klaus wants to get sober for Dave and Ben is instantly thankful for someone he’s never even met because he obviously made Klaus  _ so  _ happy and he’s making Klaus want to get sober. 

A family meeting is called. Vanya gets upset because she’s not included and Ben wants to tell her that it isn’t  _ her _ they’re not including, it’s her boyfriend because they don’t want to scare him off by telling him about the apocalypse.  _ (Ben also has a strong distrust towards her boyfriend and doesn’t entirely know why).  _

Luther chokes Klaus and throws across the room and Ben wants to scream. He wants to ask where the leader went that blamed himself for the death of one of the siblings. He wants to scream that he  _ hurt  _ Klaus and good leaders don’t do that. Good siblings don’t do that. 

Together, Klaus and Ben go looking for Luther. They find him in a rave and Klaus  **_dies_ ** and Ben panics and screams because it was  _ him _ who told Klaus to look for Luther and now he’s dead and Luther is just walking away. 

Klaus comes back and informs Ben that God doesn’t like him. Ben cries with relief and tries to hug him. Of course, it fails, but it’s really the sentiment that counts. After the attempted hug, Klaus tells Ben that their father killed himself. Ben can’t find it in himself to really care. 

Allison’s in trouble _ (so is Vanya) _ . They rush to find her and Ben needs to look away the moment they step into the cabin because there’s  _ so much blood _ . His first thought is if she’s going to survive this because he doesn’t want  _ any _ of his siblings to become a ghost, even if it means they’d be able to talk. His second thought is that Vanya is still with her boyfriend who is dangerous. 

Vanya’s the one that slit Allison’s throat. 

Ben’s not sure what to do with his information. His first instinct is denial because, no matter what hurtful things her autobiography said, Vanya  **_loves_ ** her siblings. Ben knows it as confidently as he knows the sky is blue and water is wet.  _ (Well, scratch that last one. There was a lot of debate in 2018, which Klaus joined just for the drama).  _

He sees Vanya in the bunker underground and instantly understands that she’s terrified. She’s terrified of her new power and he knows this because he understands how it feels to be afraid. She’s screaming something and he doesn’t need to be able to read lips to know that she’s sorry and that she never meant to hurt anyone. 

Thinking back on the look she had when Klaus confronted her about the book, he realizes that wasn’t meant to hurt their siblings either. It just had. 

Diego and Klaus are fighting to let her out and Ben feels proud because even  _ Diego _ who supposedly hates her doesn’t want her to be left in a cage. Luther refutes because she hurt Allison. Ben wants to scream at him because he hurt Klaus with his powers. 

Allison comes. She wants to get Vanya out. For a moment Ben is relieved because  _ of course _ Luther will listen to Allison. She’s always been able to get through to him. 

“She stays put,” Luther says and Ben feels rage fill his body. 

They leave. They all leave her behind in the cage and for a moment Ben wants to run back down there, but Klaus is trying to take drugs and Ben won’t let him get high again. Without thinking, he goes to punch Klaus. 

It connects. 

They continue to try to make physical contact but then there’s a loud noise and shaking and somehow Ben just  _ knows _ Vanya got out. Soon, the house is being destroyed and Diego hits his head. Ben doesn’t think when he pulls Diego and Klaus to safety and is only slightly annoyed that Klaus got the credit.  _ (He’s most jealous because he hasn’t hugged anyone in so long and he would’ve loved to get a hug from Diego).  _

Klaus becomes the lookout and it’s all going well until Ben hears gunshots from inside the theatre. Klaus finally runs in because of Cha-Cha and not because of the guns. 

If he could breathe, then his breath would be taken away at this moment. Vanya is turning white and she’s absolutely  _ glowing  _ with power. 

She looks  _ ethereal _ . 

She’s  _ mesmerizing _ and Ben only manages to look away because Klaus needs his help. 

Klaus manages to make him corporeal and he unleashes The Horror _ (the thing that killed him) _ and he does it in order to protect his siblings. He does it for his siblings who are looking at him like they’ve seen a ghost—which they technically have. Even Vanya’s _ (is she even Vanya anymore?) _ eyes linger for a moment. 

He goes back to being an incorporeal ghost and his brother’s charge at his sister. For a moment he’s worried. He’s worried because he loves her and he loves them and he doesn’t want any of them getting hurt. 

There’s a bright light and her powers have them suspended in midair.

His mind flashes to his tentacles and how they destroyed him. He doesn’t want to see Vanya’s powers destroy her. 

He wants to run to help his siblings but he can’t move because he’s too focused on Vanya. 

She’s fucking  **_terrifying_ ** . Her powers are  **_terrifying_ ** , but they’re beautiful at the same time. He can almost feel the earth through her powers and he’s not sure if his siblings can feel it too or if it’s just because he’s a ghost, but he can almost hear the earth and for a moment he thinks,  _ this is beautiful.  _

Then he pauses.

He pauses because, yes it’s amazing, but also his sister is going on a rampage and his other sister is holding a gun and for a terrifying second he thinks Allison is going to kill Vanya. For a terrifying second he thinks Vanya will kill their brothers and then Allison will kill Vanya and he doesn’t want his siblings to kill each other. 

There’s a gunshot. 

It echoes through the theatre and Vanya falls limp. Ben jerks to catch her, but Allison is already there. There’s a beam of pure white energy and it shoots into the sky.  _ (Ben is reminded that Vanya’s favorite color was always white, much like her transformation).  _

He approaches the stage and his siblings are all okay and they’re going to get through this as a family. 

The moon is cracked and it’s breaking apart. 

Ben doesn’t feel fear at first. No, his first emotion is  **_pride._ **

He’s proud because Vanya, sweet little Vanya, who always wanted powers, has them and they’re  **_so powerful_ ** . 

Vanya, who has  _ always _ been  **_special_ ** even without powers has just become even more special. 

He’s proud she made it this far and he’s proud that she had enough energy to kill them all instantly but she  **_didn’t._ **

It’s only then that he realizes that the moon has been destroyed and the world is going to end. 

If he was alive he would’ve been able to feel the fire as it gets closer.

He almost  _ can _ feel the heat, but it’s more of a phantom feeling.

Five says he’s going to time travel them before all this.

Ben believes in him.

He looks down at Vanya, who caused the  **_apocalypse_ ** , and smiles because he knows that, even though she’s very destructive, they all love her. 

There’s a flash and then they’ve gone off to a different time.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Klaus would 100% start fandom discourse on Tumblr.


	4. I Want an Ocean View

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanya and Ben walk down a path of shared dreams and find themselves in a place of their imagination. 
> 
> Or, after stopping the apocalypse, Vanya and Ben go on a road trip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so hard to write omg! I'm so sorry it took so long everyone!! It's not quite as long as I wanted, but it's here. I hope you like this chapter regardless. Please accept the happy ending I promised! 
> 
> I will not be expanding on how they stopped the apocalypse in this fanfic. I will probably have a separate fanfic which will consist of side-stories, though I'll try not to have it be too long. 
> 
> Again, the title is from the song "This Town" by Kygo ft. Sasha Sloan.

There’s rain.

Ben shifts uncomfortably because he hates the way the rain can phase through him. He looks up at the rain with a scowl, but he doesn’t move to retreat under Klaus’ umbrella. He won’t risk phasing through Klaus because rain is more preferable than other people. 

The sky is grey and it’s silent. Too silent. He gets that it’s a funeral, but the silence feels  _ wrong,  _ as if he was just listening to a million sounds at once. Finally,  _ finally _ , there’s noise again. His eyes scan the courtyard for the origin, and his eyes land on Vanya’s body which is now slumped on the ground. 

“Shit.” 

Five’s voice rings through the silence and everything comes back to Ben in a rush. He’s hit with all the events from the past week and, before he even gets the chance to process it all, there’s shouting. His siblings are shouting and accusations are flying everywhere and Ben thinks that maybe, just maybe, they should focus on their sister who is currently lying unconscious. 

The next few months are hell, to put it mildly. 

Vanya begins training with her powers and Five starts trying to construct Ben a new body using methods via The Commission. Ben’s not entirely sure how he feels about that. He likes the thought of being alive _ (though he’s not sure he’ll even remember how to breathe) _ , but also, what the fuck? The concept of having a body, an actual body, constructed for him is unsettling. Still, Five and all his siblings seem pretty excited with the idea, so Ben thinks he’ll try it. 

A lot happens after the apocalypse but that’s all a story for another day. The important thing is the family tries to bond. In fact, there’s a lot of bonding that occurs once Ben gets a body. It’s so much that sometimes it feels suffocating and, honestly, Ben isn’t sure he can handle a road trip with everyone. Which is sadly just what Allison is suggesting. 

Ben catches Vanya’s eye while Allison is talking of her plans for family bonding. He sees the same weariness in her eyes. When he thinks about it, both of them had gone years without interacting with this many people. Siblings or not, the entire thing could be stressful. 

Vanya seems to notice a similar look of apprehension in Ben’s eyes, because soon she’s raising her hand to get Allison’s attention. Ben notes that she’s polite about it while any of their other siblings would’ve just interrupted. 

“Actually,” Vanya begins hesitantly. She takes a deep breath and continues. “Ben and I were planning on a road trip of our own. For some one-on-one sibling bonding.” 

She turns to look at Ben again and smirks.

“We’re going to a little ocean-side town on the west coast.” 

Ben feels childish excitement coarse through his veins _ (his veins which actually exist again) _ once he understands what Vanya’s implying. He grins and he’s sure if he were to look in a mirror, he’d see his eyes light up. 

“Oh,” Allison says, obviously shocked.

She looks a little hurt and, while Ben feels bad, he reasons that at least they’re not leaving in the dead of night without letting anyone know. At least, Ben thinks while surveying the room, at least Five seems happy to get out of the road trip. Allison most likely won’t plan the road trip if not all of them can go. 

“Okay, I understand. We’ll do the road trip ourselves,” Allison says. 

She has a familiar glint in her eyes and Ben gets a bit uneasy. He knows she’s up to something, he just doesn’t know what yet. Before he can further contemplate, she’s dragging everyone except him and Vanya from the room. He files the look in her eyes to the back of his mind and focuses on Vanya. 

“I wasn’t informed we’d be going to the west coast,” Ben says playfully. 

“It’s been planned for years Ben. It’s time we did something about it, don’t you think?” 

Ben wholeheartedly agrees with her. For all the years of dreaming about it, and all the months of having a physical body, he’d never actually thought about executing the escape as a road trip. 

“When do we leave?” He asks. 

* * *

The next day, both Ben and Vanya are packed and standing in the foyer. Allison is saying goodbye in a slightly passive aggressive way, but ultimately is letting them go without a fuss—and without making plans to do a family road trip later. 

Vanya and Ben share a look. There’s no way Allison would set aside their group family bonding sessions so easily. Vanya shuffles closer to Ben discreetly and slips a piece of paper into his hand. Ever so slightly, he moves his hand to be at an angle where he can see the note.  _ (It’s been years since they’ve done this, yet somehow it comes so naturally).  _

_ ‘She’s up to something,’  _ The note says. 

Ben nods slightly to show Vanya he agrees. Vanya looks back at Allison and smiles. Allison fusses over them for a few more minutes, she’s making sure they have everything they need, and then they’re hugging and Ben and Vanya are out the door. 

They walk to the train station in a comfortable silence. Vanya looks up at the blue sky, listens to the peaceful melody the day provides, and concludes that today is good. She’s with her brother and she’s about to start an adventure she’s been craving for over a decade. 

She can hear children playing in the nearby park and the soccer match that is currently going on. She can hear laughter and different radio stations from cars passing by. One might think all this is overwhelming, but it’s not. It feels  _ right  _ and Vanya now knows exactly how dull her life was before she stopped suppressing her powers. 

She can hear her heartbeat race as they get closer to the train station. She can hear the sound of the trains get louder and louder as they get closer and closer. She’s overflowing with excitement and she knows Ben feels the same because she can hear his heartbeat too. =

The train station is bustling with people when they arrive. Ben and Vanya have a bit of trouble finding their train, but soon enough they’re settling in their seats. Vanya keeps her eyes on the window. She’s eager to start moving—it’s her first time on a train afterall. She’s been on the subway before, but there’s something about the train that’s  _ different.  _ It’s cleaner and the seats are actually comfortable. 

“Being alive again is exhausting,” Ben says beside her. “I’m going to take a nap. It’s a long ride to Pittsburgh.”

She nods her agreement but keeps her eyes on the window. They begin moving and soon she hears Ben’s breathing slow to an even pace. He’s right; it’ll be a long train ride. 10-12 hours to be exact. Her fingers itch to play her violin to pass the time, but she knows she can’t. 

She doesn’t mind the wait, not really. There’s a sense of freedom that comes with being on this train even if they’re not running from anything. She guesses the taste of freedom is from following her childhood, well, teenage dream. 

She looks away from the window and grabs a book from her bag. She smiles at the cover and begins reading. The sound of the train, the wind, and the other passengers makes nice whitenoise for Vanya as she immerses herself in the story. 

She’s nearly done by time Ben wakes up. She looks at him from the corner of her eye and smiles. He smiles back. 

“I hope you’re willing to lend that book to me once you’ve finished,” He says, his voice still heavy with sleep. 

“You know, I read your book,” He continues before she can reply. 

She tenses at the mention of her book. All it ever did was bring misery. It fractured her already broken family and isolated her even more. She can safely say it’s the second biggest mistake she’s made in her life.  _ (The first, of course, is causing the apocalypse).  _

Ben, sensing her unease, quickly elaborates. 

“Your fictional books, I mean. So did Klaus. I think he’s still mad Aeryn was killed off.” 

Vanya lets out a little laugh and blinks the tears away. She sets down her book and grabs his hand. He squeezes back and it helps ease her emotions. 

“I’m happy you read it,” She admits truthfully. 

“I’m happy you wrote it,” He replies. 

Vanya shrugs and looks down at her hands. 

“I needed to share those stories with the world somehow. They were too precious to be forgotten,” She says. 

After that they sit in a comfortable silence. Vanya quickly finishes her book and hands it over to Ben before she grabs a crossword puzzle from her bag. They make small talk and occasionally discuss something that happens in the book. 

She scowls at her crossword puzzle before abandoning it and turning to Ben instead. He must notice her gaze on him because he looks up from his book to meet her eyes. 

They’re silent communication is cut short by the arrival of food. Ben and Vanya both take a similar meal and thank the attendant. As they eat they begin sharing stories of their lives _ (or life after death in Ben’s case). _

Vanya tells some stories of her college years and Ben tells some surprisingly dramatic stories of conversations he overheard whilst being dead. 

“Did you ever check up on our siblings?” Vanya asks. 

“Well, most. I couldn’t really check on Allison and I always hated getting near the house while Dad was alive, but I visited you and Diego a lot,” He replies. 

Vanya smiles, then blushes a deep red. Sometimes when she was particularly lonely she would talk out loud and she  _ really _ hopes Ben never heard her. It’s not like she said anything that deep, it was just random what-if scenarios that were really weird. . Honestly, she’d be fine with Ben witnessing anything as long as it wasn’t her embarrassing monologues. 

“I didn’t see anything embarrassing, don’t worry,” Ben says gently, as if he’s read her mind. 

She feels instant relief and lets out a little sigh. She smiles and grabs her drink. 

“Although I did see that time you attempted to play the triangle. To this day I don’t know how you failed so horribly,” Ben says nonchalantly. 

Vanya chokes on her water. She completely forgot about that incident which was much worse than her monologues. She turns back to Ben only to find him lightly smirking. He  _ definitely  _ has been influenced by Klaus. 

“It was the cat’s fault,” Vanya says in a strained voice. 

Ben laughs and Vanya’s so happy to hear the sound that she momentarily forgets her embarrassment. 

* * *

Pittsburgh is nice, though they’re only staying one night. The motel they’re staying in isn’t far from the train station so it’s a quick walk. It’s not a bad motel, it certainly doesn’t look like people have been killed in it, but they don’t really want to leave their stuff alone so they order takeout. 

They continue on their journey and don’t really stop anywhere until they get to Chicago a few days after they left. They’re following their original route as much as possible and had originally deemed Chicago far enough to stay for a few days. 

They stay at a nice hotel which has 4 stars. They’re room is on the 14th floor and has a nice view of the city. The hotel wasn’t part of their original plan—as kids they didn’t have a lot of money—but now they have billions of dollars in inheritance. Ben and Vanya are both a little hesitant to use their father’s money, but ultimately decided that using his money for this would’ve angered him. 

“There’s a sushi place a few blocks away,” Ben says, looking up from his phone. 

He’s sitting on his bed, which is more comfortable than the one at the academy ever was, and looking for a place to get dinner. They’re both tired, but also excited to be in a new city. New York is great, but everything is new here and there’s so much to explore. 

“I haven’t had sushi since college,” Vanya says.

“I’ve never had sushi.” 

“Let’s go.”

Soon they’re walking out the lobby and into the chilled night air. It’s refreshing, Ben thinks. It’s refreshing as the new clothes Ben’s wearing and refreshing as being able to breathe. Ben appreciates many things, but he really appreciated being  _ alive.  _

“There’s so much to see,” Vanya mutters beside him. 

Ben can’t help but agree. Lot’s of cities are the same in the sense that there’s constantly something happening. There’s always lights and people and sounds, but somehow Chicago feels different than New York. Maybe it’s the lack of trauma that drapes over New York like a blanket. Everytime Ben walks in New York, he can look at a specific store, a specific bank, a specific bridge, and see the fight that occurred there. Fights that children fought—children who should’ve been playing and should’ve been able to feel safe. 

His train of thought is paused when Vanya suddenly halts her movement. He turns back to her and sees a distressed look on her face. Her eyes flash white for a moment and Ben mentally scolds himself for flinching. He knows she has better control of herself and that she wouldn’t hurt him, it’s just that he can still remember the Academy tumbling down. 

“Someone’s getting mugged one block away in an alleyway. It sounds like it might get messy,” Vanya says. 

She looks as if she’s debating whether or not they go rescue the person and Ben understands how she feels. When he first started missions, he felt bad because he couldn’t possibly save  _ everyone _ . He used to wonder if it was alright to choose who to save. It took a bit of reminding for him to realise it’s best to help as many people as you can. 

He grabs Vanya’s wrist and sends her a, hopefully, confident smile. 

“Lead the way.” 

They push their way through the crowds of people and at one point Vanya gasps and begins running faster. The block seems impossibly long, but before long they arrive at the scene. 

The victim is bloodied and most definitely has a broken arm. It’s a young man, looks like a college student, and he’s shaking. He’s also at gunpoint. Unfortunately for them, the attacker notices their arrival. 

“Not a step closer. If you move, I’ll blast his brains out.” 

Unfortunately for the attacker, they have powers which are faster than bullets. Vanya’s eyes glow white and the gun is knocked out of the guy’s hand. The guy himself is flung to the back of the alley. 

Ben, thankful to have avoided using his powers, focuses on calming the student down. Behind him, Ben can hear Vanya calling 911 while he guides the student through some breathing exercises. Occasionally he looks over at the now unconscious attacker just to make sure he hasn’t escaped. 

“The police and an ambulance will be here soon. You’re okay. You’re safe,” Ben reassures. 

Later, after the police arrived and they made sure the victim would get proper medical attention, Ben and Vanya sit in a sushi restaurant and Ben congratulates Vanya. 

“You’ve really gotten a grasp on your powers,” Ben says. 

Vanya smiles shyly at the praise. 

“I was so scared I wasn’t going to be fast enough. I was worried he would shoot the gun and I was worried I wouldn’t be able to stop the bullet,” She admits. “I can’t imagine how stressful your missions must’ve been.” 

“They were really stressful. It’s always going to be part of our lives and we’ll probably all continue to have nightmares, but at least we’ve moved past it. At least our biggest causes of stress are from what color we should repaint the second floor bathroom and whether or not I should order more sushi,” Ben says. 

Vanya laughs a little before quieting. 

“Wow, we must really be tired. Hargreeves never talk about our emotions,” She says in an overly serious voice.

Both her and Ben laugh and switch the conversation even as she squeezes his hand in comfort. 

* * *

They wake up early the next morning so they can visit as many places as possible. Vanya snags the shower before Ben so takes some time to people watch from the window. Even without eavesdropping, Ben has become good at reading people. There really isn’t much to do during death. 

After Vanya and Ben have both showered, they leave the hotel and begin walking through the streets. There’s a different atmosphere now that it’s day. They decide to head to a book store first—literature is always a good way to start the day in their opinion. 

They’re browsing through the shelves when a book catches Vanya’s eye. She takes a closer look and realizes that, although she’s never read it, it’s familiar. Perhaps it’s the title or the art or even the mention of greek mythology, but it feels familiar. She picks it up and quickly looks for a date. It was published in 2019 which means she definitely hasn’t read it. 

She looks at the author and suddenly it all clicks into place. She looks at the shelf it’s displayed on and realizes if she’d just looked there in the first place then her questions would’ve been answered. 

“There’s so many books,” She mumbles to herself. 

“Hey Ben, come over here!”

Ben appears from the aisle next to her. She beckons him closer and together they stare at the books in amazement. 

“We’re getting all of them,” Ben says. 

Also using their father’s money, because he would’ve hated it being used to buy so many fictional books, they buy 22 books from the bookstore. The person working there looks slightly confused by the fact that they’re buying all of them at once, but ultimately the purchase occurs without a problem. 

“The covers changed,” Ben says, holding up the first book. 

“Well it was originally published in 2005,” Vanya points out. 

The summer of 2005, when they were in the earlier stages of their escape plans, they snuck out to a bookstore. They weren’t really planning on buying anything, they already had so many books in their library and their mother could get them books, but they’d both seen one book that they just knew they had to buy. 

Ben died before the second book came out and Vanya couldn’t bear to read it without him. Eventually she forgot about it, but now here they are with 22 books and they have no idea what order to read it in. 

“Okay, so we start with  _ Percy Jackson _ , and then  _ Heroes of Olympus _ happens directly after,” Vanya says after she looks it up on her phone. 

“We can read the  _ Kane Chronicles _ after, though it doesn’t really matter. The only way we’ll get spoilers is for the crossovers which occur after both series. Though I don’t think we bought any of the crossovers anyway. We can read  _ Magnus Chase _ and  _ Trials of Apollo _ before or after the other,” Vanya finishes. 

Ben nods along as he glances between the bags with the books. 

“I guess one of us can start first and once we get to  _ Magnus Chase _ and  _ Trials of Apollo _ we can both read one series then switch,” He suggests. 

Vanya nods to show her agreement. They’re walking back to the hotel to quickly drop off the books because they do  _ not _ want to carry them around all day. The detour in their plans is short and definitely worth it. Soon enough, they’re back on the streets of Chicago. 

Vanya and Ben walk in a comfortable silence. Silence has always been comfortable when they were together—neither of them are talkative people. They’ve both come out of their shells more; Vanya because of being off her meds and Ben because of his years with Klaus. Still, the two of them are able to find peace without having to speak. 

Vanya’s not in complete silence, she never is anymore, and she can still hear Ben. Not him talking, but just him in general. She can hear the shuffle of his clothing and the occasional fidget of his hands.  _ (She can also hear The Horror moving and twisting, but she pretends not to notice).  _

The, somewhat, peaceful song of the city is interrupted when she hears a cat hiss and a crash. Although it’s a new addition of sound, her mind focuses on the fact that it’s a cat and she’s reminded of one of the plans made by her and Ben. 

“Remember those cats we were going to get? The ones we’d name after our siblings?” She doesn’t look, but she can hear Ben’s nod of agreement so she continues.

“Imagine if we got them now and still named them after our siblings. Imagine the chaos of never knowing  _ which _ Klaus broke a window.” 

Ben snorts beside her and she beams. Even now, the ability to invoke such reactions from her siblings makes her feel as if she’s floating. She’s still getting used to actually being noticed by people again. 

“Imagine all the things that poor cat would be blamed for,” Ben replies solemnly. 

They both burst out laughing. A few people turn to look at them, but most just continue on their day. It’s far from the weirdest thing in the city. 

“What if,” Vanya starts, but breaks down laughing instead. 

She tries again.

“What if Mom gets really attached to the cats. Do you think Diego would be jealous of cat Diego?” 

“Of course!” 

They continue sharing hypothetical situations until they need to sit down at a bench because they’re laughing so hard. They sit and occasionally their knees brush together and their elbows bump up against each other and they feel so alive. 

It’s nice, and neither of them would trade it for the world.

* * *

They’ve stopped at a small town in Colorado for a few days. Right now, they’re relaxing in the hotel room for the night. They’ve got the TV and are both reading their books. It’s been nearly 2 weeks since they left, and they should arrive at the wet coast in another week.

Vanya’s reading  _ Mark of Athena  _ while Ben reads  _ Son of Neptune _ . Occasionally Ben will make a comment about something he’s read and him and Vanya will dive into a short conversation. They have an unspoken agreement to talk about their thoughts while reading if the other person has read the book before. 

“I’m just confused as to why Percy remembers Annabeth, but Jason didn’t remember anyone! Obviously Jason had bonds as well, so why is Percy different?” Ben asks. 

“Probably because Percy’s the main character,” Vanya says with a shrug. 

There’s a sudden noise from the room next to them as well as muffled shouts to be quiet. Vanya and Ben share a look. As much as they like to pretend this is a trip for just themselves, they’ve both noticed the constant chaos in the room next to them in  _ every _ hotel they stay at. Not to mention the people reading upside down magazines in restaurants they eat at. 

Vanya gets up from her bed and moves to sit beside Ben on his. They both listen until the shouts have quieted and Vanya hears the door next to them open and close. 3 footsteps head down the hallway which means 2 people are still in the room next to them. 

“They’re so obvious,” Ben whispers to her. 

“I think they forget I have super hearing,” Vanya whispers back. 

Her eyes scan the margins of the page Ben is on. It’s filled with small notes. They’re not spoilers or anything really profound, but they’re small notes on what she liked and also questions on what Ben thinks of a certain passage. The habit started when Five, Ben, and herself found the library at age 8. They’d begun reading books and left each other little notes in the margins. At first they’d been sweet notes that had nothing to do with the book, but eventually it shifted to small analyses and mentions of how certain lines reminded them of each other. 

Ben closes the book and Vanya looks at him in confusion. He’s wearing a mischievous grin that Vanya knows he picked up from Klaus and she’s instantly on edge. He carefully sets the book down on the side table and shifts to turn towards her more. 

“So Vanya,” He begins in  _ that _ tone of voice. 

Everyone knows  _ that _ tone of voice and for the Hargreeves it usually comes from Klaus or Allison. As it turns out, Ben is also capable of speaking in  _ that _ voice.  _ (Vanya’s not sure if she could and she isn’t sure if she wants to try).  _

It’s the tone of voice teenagers adapt when talking about crushes or drama. It’s the tone of voice that comes before a dare that lets one know that they’ve made a terrible mistake. In short, nothing good ever comes from  _ that _ tone of voice. 

“Are you seeing anyone?” 

Of course it’s that question. Afterall, it’s the question  _ that _ voice is used most for. 

“Why do you ask?” Vanya says, her voice steady. 

She hopes she’s portraying more confidence than she has. The truth is, she’s  _ almost _ seeing someone. As in, they’ve had one date and have another one planned for after the trip. Vanya doesn’t know how Ben knows about this, but she can’t let him know he’s right. 

“I have a feeling,” He replies. “Now stop avoiding the question.” 

Vanya shrugs and turns back to her book. That doesn’t last long, because Ben soon takes it out of her hands. She sighs and looks at him. 

“I have a date after the trip with Jess. You never met her, but do you remember me talking about her? I ran into her again,” She reveals. 

“Oh! Your first friend outside the Academy? She likes soft things, right?” 

Vanya nods. 

“How’d you find her again?” 

“It was after we told Allison we’d be going on the trip,” She begins. 

* * *

_ Vanya walked down the street slowly. The walk to the coffee shop was nice and the sun was shining in the way that made Vanya feel the right amount of warmth.  _

_ The coffee shop was full of people when Vanya walked in. It was to be expected, Vanya decided to go during lunch hours and the coffee shop was situated in a very popular mall. Vanya ignored the other people and told herself no one was looking at her.  _

_ “Vanya Vasiliev?”  _

_ Except maybe one person.  _

_ Vanya turned and saw the most beautiful woman in her life. The way she was standing in front of the window and the small smile she had on her face made her look like a goddess. Maybe she was one. Vanya had literally blown up the moon and apparently Klaus had met a little girl god. Perhaps there were more.  _

_ “I’m Jess. You used to play violin on the street corner, right?” She asked.  _

_ “Right! I remember you! I really enjoyed your company,” Vanya said a bit too quickly.  _

_ For a moment she feared she’d embarrassed herself, but Jess laughed in the way that always put Vanya’s nerves at ease. It reminded Vanya of all the times Jess had washed away her worries with that laugh when they were teenagers.  _

_ “If I remember correctly, we almost had a date at this very café,” Jess said with a smirk. “We could do it now if you’d like.”  _

_ Vanya found herself admiring Jess’ confidence. Vanya could never be able to ask someone on a date so quickly.  _

_ “Yeah! I’d, um, I’d like that,” Vanya manages to say.  _

_ Jess smiled and it was brighter than anything Vanya had ever seen—including her powers.  _

* * *

“Then we talked and made plans for after the trip,” Vanya finishes. 

She looks at Ben and finds herself surprised at his reaction. He looks so genuinely happy for her and she’s not sure what to do with that knowledge. Thankfully, he saves her the trouble of having to say anything. 

“You have to introduce me to her! She sounds so good for you Vanya! Definitely a step up from your last relationship,” He says. 

She rolls her eyes. Ben and Klaus have been ganging up on her in their teasing of the almost-apocalypse and her past relationship. There’s no harm in it and she’s actually happy to have a somewhat normal sibling thing to do with them, but it can get tiresome. 

“Who would your godly parent be?” She asks, quickly changing the subject. 

He narrows his eyes at her, but she refuses to back down. He eases up and looks back towards the books. 

“You’re off the hook this time, Van,” He says. 

He gets a thoughtful look that means he’s contemplating something. Hopefully Vanya’s question and not some other way to pry into her life. 

“Athena,” He says finally. “You?” 

“Probably Apollo. Though in terms of power, maybe Zeus. Though I’d really prefer not to trade out one asshole dad for another,” She says. 

Ben laughs again, and god her siblings’ laughs intoxicating, and she joins in. This trip is nice. It’s comforting in a way that’s different than if it were a group trip. Honestly, Vanya hadn’t realised how nice spending time with  _ one  _ sibling would be. It’s much better than listening to Luther, Diego, and Five, get into fights with each other. 

“You know, Zeus is one of the biggest assholes in literature, but I still think comparing him to Dad is an insult. Zeus is obviously better than Dad,” Ben says. 

“Amen to that!” 

There’s another half hour of silence while Ben and Vanya continue to read their books. Thankfully Vanya has mastered the ability to control her reactions because some really shocking stuff happens in her book and she doesn’t want to spoil Ben. She grabs her pencil and makes a little note in the margins of the book, then sets both the pencil and the book down. 

“We should order takeout,” Vanya says. 

Ben looks at her, up at the clock, back at her, blinks, then squints as if he hadn’t heard her right. 

“It’s nearly midnight. We ate 4 hours ago,” He says. “Besides, we should be going to bed soon and we shouldn’t eat this close to sleeping.” 

Vanya frowns. She knows he’s right, and she knows he’s always been logical, but she’s had a sudden craving for orange chicken and really wants some. She doesn’t get cravings often, but she heard their hotel neighbors come back and they said they had orange chicken and now she wants some orange chicken. Part of her wants to tell him all about this, but she’s never really been confrontational and she doesn’t really feel like bringing it up. 

“We’ve survived worse,” She says instead. 

“What do you even want to get?” He asks. 

“Orange chicken.” 

He pauses, looks as if he’s realized the meaning of the universe, and picks up his phone without a word. He types something into the search bar and a couple minutes later he’s calling a takeout place and ordering orange chicken. She stares at him and raises an eyebrow. 

“I was going to deny you the food, but then you made  _ me _ crave orange chicken so now we’ll both have to deal with the consequences,” He explains. 

“Just another bad decision to add onto the list,” She says. 

* * *

When Ben steps off the bus, he’s relieved. As much as he’s enjoyed their train and bus travels, it’ll be nice to stay in one place for a couple weeks. Besides, knowing they’ve reached their destination is nice. He glances at Vanya, looks over at the large van for a second, then continues to look around the small town. 

“Do you think they know we’ve noticed?” Vanya asks. 

Ben follows her gaze and lands on the aforementioned van. It’s very brightly colored and has spray paint on it’s doors. The windows are tinted and he can see the people inside fighting about something. None of them even notice he and Vanya are watching. 

“They’re idiots, of course they don’t know,” He says. 

Vanya accepts his answer and they begin the walk to their rental home. They’d originally thought about getting another hotel, but decided a house would be a better option—it would be more private and Ben needs the space. 

“Wanna bet they’ll set up tents outside the house?” He asks. 

“They’re 100% going to do it, aren’t they?” Vanya asks with a tired sigh. 

Ben solemnly nods and they both share a moment of silence for their sanity. Their thoughts are washed away when they actually arrive at the house. It’s not directly on the beach, but it’s close enough. It’s in walking distance, as are most places in the town. 

The house house has an ocean view and both Ben and Vanya are smiling as they open the door. The small kitchen is directly in front of them and there’s a small living and dining area to their right. There’s a deck which can be accessed through the kitchen/dining area. Off the living room is a tiny hallway with 3 doors—the bedrooms and bathroom. 

“This is nice. Maybe we should actually buy property here,” Ben says. 

Vanya smiles at the thought. There isn’t a need to buy property other than the fact that it’s childhood fulfilment and it would make their dad upset. Neither of them are petty enough to actually do it because their dad would disapprove.  _ (They do, eventually, end up buying property because they really are that petty).  _

“We should drop our stuff off in our rooms and then we can go get lunch and check out the beach,” Vanya suggests. 

“That sounds like a good plan,” Ben says. 

They’re out the door again in 5 minutes. They walk past restaurants and souvenir shops that are full of tourists, but they’re not sure where they want to go. They debate what type of food they should get while they walk. They both keep an eye out, but the only noticeable thing is the person with a neon pink skirt observing them from across the street. They steer clear of him. 

“At this rate we should just check out the grocery store,” Ben mumbles. Then, “actually, we should do that. We could get pre-packaged sandwiches.” 

They ask around for directions, buy the sandwiches, and finally make it to the beach. There’s a lot of people around, but they both only have eyes for the ocean. The waves aren’t big and there are a few kids playing around in the water. The ocean breeze chills Vanya a bit, but Ben seems fine. 

“I’ve never seen the pacific ocean,” Vanya admits. 

“I think Allison is the only one who has,” Ben replies. 

They take one look at each other and, as if they’re making up for their stolen childhood, they take off their shoes and run full speed towards the ocean. 

Vanya feels giddy as she rushes towards the sea. Even with the wind blowing uncomfortably in her eyes, she feels happy. For most of her life she was numb to everything around her. Since the almost-apocalypse, she’s felt  _ alive _ and she loves it. She loves every moment, every emotion, and every connection she’s been able to feel. She loves connecting to the world around her in a way she hadn’t before. She loves the small sounds she notices and she loves actually  _ appreciating _ the sun on her skin. Feeling the rocky sand under her feet, she feels a high and she can’t help but let out a laugh. 

Her and Ben reach the ocean and instantly they both shriek in shock. They stumble over each other and end up falling face first into the water. Their clothes are soaked and they’re chilled because apparently the water is really cold in the pacific northwest, but they’re still so happy. 

“Why is it so cold?” Vanya asks between her laughs. 

“I don’t know!” Ben replies. 

Still, they sit there until they become numb to the cold. They go a bit further from shore and actually splash each other with the water. They feel like kids and that’s okay because they never got to be kids when they were younger. 

Vanya uses her powers to slightly lift the water so she can completely soak Ben. He sputters in indignation and puts a hand over his heart dramatically. 

“Vanya! How could you use your powers against me like this? The betrayal is too great! My heart is wounded! Oh how I have fallen before the mighty.” 

He finishes by sinking to his knees and then he submerges completely. He comes up moments later and both of them begin laughing again. He grabs her arms and she barely protests as he pulls her down. She gets a mouthful of salt water whilst laughing and begins coughing. 

“I didn’t know salt water hurt so much when swallowed! It burns Ben!” She yells dramatically. Then, slyly, “I dare you to drink some.” 

He scrunches his nose up in disgust, but doesn’t back down from the challenge. He begins coughing instantly. He glares daggers at the water as if it had personally killed him. 

“Look at that! More shared trauma for us to bond over,” He says with an eye roll. 

They both hear a shriek from another person—most likely due to the cold water—and they turn their heads. They see someone slowly walking over to them, but they stop and shudder every so often. 

“They’re not even trying to pretend they’re not there,” Vanya says. 

“I’m not sharing a room with them,” Ben says back. 

“I have had to spend WEEKS watching you two have fun and I haven’t been able to join in! But SURPRISE! We came to surprise you!!” 

Klaus grins at them and, looking past him, Vanya can see the rest of their family slowly coming towards them. Allison’s frowning and Diego looks 1 second away from pushing Luther in. Five looks at the water, contemplating, before teleporting onto Diego’s back to avoid the water. Sadly, this causes Diego to stumble and they both fall in the water. Vanya looks back at Klaus. 

“We’ve known you were following us the entire time,” Vanya admits. 

“You’re not exactly subtle and Van has super hearing,” Ben adds. 

“What?! You didn’t think to save me from these people?” Klaus says gesturing behind him. 

Ben looks and sees Five currently glaring at everyone from the shore while trying to dry his hair with his blazer. Allison is doing good, she’s gotten to the point that the water is at her waist, but then something pulls her under. Diego pops up from where he was probably holding his breath, and grins at her. Then, he shoves Luther down and that causes an entirely different water battle. Ben looks back at Klaus. 

“We really didn’t want to get involved,” He explains. 

“Besides,” Vanya begins. “This was  _ supposed _ to be a trip for just the two of us.” 

Klaus pouts at that. 

Vanya scans the group, her family, and actually smiles. Yes, it was wonderful to go on the trip with Ben. The quality time was nice and relaxing, as opposed to the fighting she often overheard, and it lifted a burden from her chest. It had lifted the lingering guilt for not leaving sooner—for not running away before Ben died. Now though? Now she looks at her family and she’s happy they followed her and Ben. She’s happy because she loves them and for once in their lives they’re actually acting like a family. 

“I’m glad you all came,” She says quietly.

Klaus coos at her and pulls her into a hug that Ben soon joins. Then he gathers all their siblings, even Five _(who’s supposedly just doing it because he’s already wet)_ , and it turns into one big soaked Hargreeves group hug. Of course, they have to stumble into the ocean, because what type of trip would it be if they didn’t run into innocent trouble such as this. 

At the end of the day, Vanya’s happy they followed. 

At the end of the day, Ben’s happy he can finally be with his family again. 

At the end of the day, they’re all able to heal their previous wounds. 

At the end of the day, Vanya realises that sometimes happy endings do happen. 

**_At the end of the day, everything is okay._ **

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's a wrap! 
> 
> I'll probably have another fanfic that will have a chapter focused on how they stopped the apocalypse and then one on the siblings stalking Ben and Vanya and that'll probably be it. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! Every kudos and comment really made me happy, thank you all <3

**Author's Note:**

> So I have the rest of the story planned. It should be out soon, I just need to write it.
> 
> Please don't hate me for killing Ben before they can run. I had to keep it canon compliant.
> 
> There will be an eventual happy ending(and maybe the slightest bit of romance between Jess and Vanya). Stay tuned! 
> 
> Kudos are great, comments make my day! (It is never too late to comment, even if when you read this it's been years).


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